The heartbeats

Chapter 13

>Abbie:

I spent the whole night in Ian's room, sitting next to his bed. I haven't had the opportunity to talk to Jasper yet. I finish preparing Ian's breakfast and I go back to his room, a tray in my hands. I open the door and he wakes up,
"just in time" I told him calmly.
He smiles and then places his hand on the wounds of his body.
"You have to eat so that you can take a tranquilizer" I demand it.
"At your command, butterfly".
He straightens up, rests his back on the head of the bed and I put a pillow behind his back so that he can sit comfortably. I look at him eating. I look at his hands, his chin, his mouth, his eyes, in other words his body and face.
"Abbie?" He calls me,
"mhm" I mumble.
"What worries this pretty min—".
The boys enter the room suddenly accompanied by Jane.
"How are you doing handsome? "James asks.
Ethan approaches Ian,
"it looks like we have a doctor here," he adds, laughing.
"Yes, I know" approves Ian, looking at me through the tip of his eyes.
A little shy smile stands on my lips and I look down. "Jasper is there? "
I look at the boys again by asking my question. Ian looks at me kindly, but also surprised. I don't know why I want to talk to him and I don't know what I'm going to tell him. Lili and Christian enter the room, "How are you ?" Christian asks Ian who is raising his head. Lili stands behind me,
"I'm sorry to have confessed to Jane that he fucked you for the first time. But I was talking with Laura and she entered the kitchen and she heard everything" she whispers to me.
"Don't worry, Lili, it's nothing," I reassure her.
She kisses my cheek and then gives me a hug from behind.We talk for an hour. Ian is starting to get tired.
"Well, we're going to let you rest, right guys?"
The tone of my voice is an order more than a question.
"And we have to prepare the lunch" I continue.
He grabs my wrist when I get up and pulls me towards him gently,
"thank you" he whispers to me.
I look him straight in the eyes, I smile at him.
"Let her go Ian" order the boys with a mockery.
We look at each other for about a minute and then he lets me go.
"Thank God it didn't last," Ethan laughs, rolling his eyes.
"It's my girlfriend, Ethan," he answers him before catching my wrist, pulling me towards him again and kissing me.
He puts his other hand on my cheek and I do the same.
"Ian" shouts Lili.
Our lips leave and I look at him, no word comes out of my mouth. As if I had been waiting for this kiss for decades. I get away from his bed and get out of his room, with a little smirk on my face.

We have finished preparing the lunch. Jasper still hasn't come.
"I can bring it to him if you want," Jane told me, trying to take the tray in my hands.
"Thank you but I'll take care of it" I refuse coldly. She smiles at me and then lets me pass. Ian is not in his bed.
"Ian?" I call him by placing the tray on his desk. "Yes, pretty butterfly ?" He answers when he leaves the bathroom, he only wears pants.
"I have to change the bandages of your wounds when you finish eating," I say.
I try not to look at him but it's fucking hard. His body is perfect. He is perfect.
"Okay, did you eat? "
He questions me by sitting on the chair of his office. "No, I'm nauseous, thank you," I reply.
"Why? "
"I have no idea," I answer.
"Did you take your medication today?" He asks me.
I nod. He starts eating. I'm looking at him again. Why do I keep looking at him? Abbie, concentrate. A few minutes have passed, he sits on the bed, the same position as this morning. I bring the first aid kit and sit next to him.
"No" he says in a more than serious voice.
"No, what?" I'm posing.
"On my lap, now" he imposes.
"Ian".
"Abbie, now".
I do what he orders me. I remove the old bandages carefully. His wounds are not open, it's a good thing. "I'm the one who should take care of you and not the other way around," he admits in a low voice.
"You don't have to, you know it, don't you?" I ask. He expires and then whispers,
"I know but I want to take care of you".
I smiled at him instead of answering him. I put on the new bandages.
"Thank you" he thanks me.
"You're welcome" I told him before I got up.
I take the tray and go down to the kitchen. Finally, I see Jasper in the living room.
"Finally, you decide to come and talk to me? Ah and yes, I'm fine, thank you for asking," he yells at me when he sees me approaching him.
I roll my eyes.
"I've been your best friend since I don't know how many years and you completely ignore me when you see him? Are you serious Abbie?" He asks me, always shouting.
The guys come to his screams but they don't say anything. They are simply looking at us.
"If you let me talk, I will have asked you how you are doing. But no, you can't wait."
The tone of my voice begins to increase. He laughs and turns on himself by caressing his forehead. "Abbie, don't be innocent now," he orders me and then he continues,
"your guy hit me," he screams.
"And do you know why he hit you?" I ask him, my tone is on the same level as earlier.
"And you? Do you know why?" He returns the question.
"Because you treat me badly. Because you talk to me as if I work for you and not as if I am your friend. Because you want to control me. Because you forced me to drink"
I end up screaming.
"I forced you to drink because you hid your accident from me. I wanted to take revenge," he admits in the end.
I feel my heart break into a thousand small pieces. My tears are getting ready to flow. I need a simple painful word for me to collapse.
"Even if there was a good chance that I died?"
My voice is broken.
"I don't care, Abbie," he answers sincerely and coldly.
And it was this sentence that allowed my tears to flow. I don't answer him. I turn around and go upstairs. I can't digest the discussion. He doesn't give a shit if I die. How could I be stupid enough to be friends with him?

Ian sees me in front of the door of my room, my tears on my cheeks.
"Hey my little butterfly, what's going on?" He asks me with a really serious voice but calmly.
He's trying to find answers and I don't give him any. He takes me to his room. I dry my tears once we enter his bedroom. He turns to the door and locks it. I'm approaching him.
"Fuck me Ian. Fuck me as if it's the last time you'll fuck someone" I order.

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