Undercare|| Fyozai

•Chapter tree

Dear Dazai,

I hope your doing well with your partner, i heard you two had complated the difficult and tiring mission you been whining about last letter. But dont get me wrong, i prefer your whinşng then silent. There is something wierd going on.

My brother is acting wierd.

After my parents dead he couldnt accept it, Fyodor couldnt accept the fact he killed our parents. So he started to act as if they were there. Table for four, parents bedrooms always same, talking to himself, telling me about what our parents did that day.

He even got me beliving.

You may think im naive and dumb for that but he was too reilistic. I toughed I was crazy and imaged my parents dead in my head and i was imaging things over and over again. He belived it too, at least i think he did pr he was just pulling tricks on me, again.

But when i fond my mothers corpse under Fyodors bed with her limps torn apart and with a fresh blood-free white dress I cam back to my senses. And you know what happened after.

Fyodor is a good boy, yes still. And i know you dont love a trype but im sure Fyodor will like you.

When i was back in Japan i told him about you and belive it or not he got hyped. Even he denied he did.

Fyodor always looks for an compatition who would reach his levels and he thinks you may be the one, i do too. I may even say a think that will get you mad at me but i hope you wont.

-Mihail Dostovasky

1917 June 14

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Okey i got it.

Hall, kitchen, livingroom, bedroom, bathroom, bedroom, bedroom, secret room.

Hall, kitchen, livingroom, bedroom, bathroom, bedroom, bedroom, secret room.

Hall, kitchen, livingroom, bedroom, bathroom, bedroom, bedroom, secret room, hall, kitchen, livingroom, bedroom, bathroom, bedroom, bedroom, secret room, hall, kitchen, livingroom, bedroom, bathroom, bedroom, bedroom, secret room.

Why everyroom looks the same.

"You will stay here for now, i asume you know how to act in a visit a friend." Fyodor says with a big smile as if something so amusing or joyfull had happened. Creep.

"I asume i do." Dazai answers with a frown. Which Fyodor finds childish, so amusing that it causes him a chuckle.

Dazai glups, watching the man before him chuckle then smile even bigger now. Fyodor stares in Dazais eyes for a moment before leanşng to him just to suddenly turn his direction down to grab Dazais suitcases that been just resring on the floor next to his feet.

But Dazai flings slightly to the sudden closeness. Dazai didnt know what he was asuming to Fyodor do but Fyodor clearly enjoyed Dazai's almost feared reaction. Maybe it was becouse his ears were still ringing  from the gun shot so close to his sensetive ear.

"I wonder what caused you to fling that hard." The russian mumbbles with a smirk as he leans back with his hands tightly holding Dazais suitcases and walks to the empty white bedroom with them as he mutters, repeating. "I wonder who."

Your mom.

Hehe.

Shut up.

Shut up. Thats not funny.

"I dont know what your trying to get out of here but i asure you, you wont get anything out of this." Dazai says with his frown deeper then ever, arms crossed and his eyes carefully watching the russian place the stuff on the floor. "Didnt your brother just die? Be sadder."

Dazai didnt know what he was getting out of this.

"Ah. Right. Mihail, what was his last words?"

Silence.

"What was is Dazai?"

That wasnt a question. It was an order.

"Dont know, dont care." Dazai bullently lied as he pushed past Fyodor to walk in the room getting prepared to be his bedroom. But when Dazai turned his head to look at Fyodor. He wasnt mad or disapointed. He was flushared.

His cheeks were red and his eyes wrre wide, panting like a rat with rabies.

он прикоснулся ко мне...
He touched me.

That words were echoing in the Russians head.

"Wierdo." Dazai mutters witout hesitetion.

"Ah."

Dazai raised an eyebrow before sighing. This was wierd. Seriously what was his last words... ah. Acually. Mihail wasnt that importent was he? Am i a bad person for not feeling bad for his dead? Am i not a good person?

"If your so hard to mind. I cant really look after you with this mind." Fyodor says with his useal tone back but his eyes were locked down and his voice sutters at the end. "Goodnight Dazai."

"Night." Glup.

~

Breath in.

Breath out.

Breath in.

Breath out.

Breath in.

Shit.

No. Dont curse. Its sin.

Fyodor flicks his tounge to his teeth as he closes the door and walks in the apartment he been for last 9 months. Goes back to his own room and closes the door too, locks it. His breath is still shakey.

Mihail was right.

He was alive. Fresh, breathing, beating, blood running, veins going, he talked too. There was no blood on the floor, no dirt on the floor, no itching feeling on his skin.

Fyodor breaths out as he walks over to his desk, his hand slides in his shirt to find the little key hanging on his necklice under his shirt and takes it out of the warmth of his chest between the fabric of his shirt. Unlocks the drawer in his desk with the key and opens the drawer. His hand washs over to the sea of old papers, letters, old pieces of papers and grabs an old letter from his dead brother a few years back.

Mihail was right.

_______________________________

•lol im alive and this thing will keep going dw.

•random funfacts real writer Dazai Osamu died in a double suicede by drowning in the river the series first episode, where Dazai was drawning. Just random fact. There was no fun in that.

•i acually wanted to just walk pass this book but i guess i will updating but i stşll want to keep the last book im writing becouse its been on my mind forever and im gonna do that kinda lşke an Y/N thing(yes im fr) but way dramatic gay and tramuatic even tho it has like 0 reads🙌🙌