It Feels Like Home

A bitter aftertaste

The kitchen was silent as you both ate. It wasn't an uncomfortable silence, but you knew you had to break it and then things could get awkward. But the longer you took to address the questions, the lesser time you'd have to clean the mess you've made – both literally and figuratively – before your fiancé would show up to take you to dinner. With thoughts rushing in your head, swallowing your omelette felt like an herculean effort all of a sudden.

— I can hear the clogs on your head working from here, (Y/n)-ya. — it was Law who broke the silence in the end.

— I... I'm so confused right now. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but I know I'll do it, eventually. I don't regret anything that we did, don't get me wrong. But I don't think it's healthy to do it again until I figure things out. For both of us. — you basically threw up those words so anxiously, your mouth felt dry. — I'm not saying we can't talk to each other. It would be weird, since we talk all the time. But I think it's better if we don't... You know...

— I understand, (Y/n)-ya. And I agree. I don't regret anything either, but I'm not the kind of guy to steal someone's fiancée. And before you ask, I don't see you any different because we got together while you're engaged. I don't think you're an awful person or whatever you're afraid of. I know you better than that. — he finished almost as anxious as you, but giving you a reassuring smile.

— Thank you, Law. Really. It may take me some time, but I'll figure things out. My therapist will hear all about it — you nervously laughed — and I'll figure it out. I just... I don't wanna hurt you. I know you have feelings for me. And I have feelings for you, otherwise, last night would've never happened. But I have to understand what those feelings are and how they'll affect things.

His right hand took yours, as his left cupped your cheek. He stared into your eyes as if he was trying to take a glimpse of your soul, smiling softly at you. He knew you were being sincere in every word and he wanted you to know that.

— I'll give you the space you need. Don't worry. I won't disappear. — he said noticing the look of fear in your eyes. — I'm heading home. I have a few things to do, maybe search for more properties to visit. I haven't found one good enough yet. I'll text you later, ok?

Law picked up the his leather jacket that was hanging from the hook behind your door and checked if he hadn't left any of his belongings behind. Before you could reach for the door and open it, he kissed you. He didn't want to risk any of your neighbors seeing him kissing you. The kiss was soft and somehow reassuring. With that, you've opened the door and he left.

You were alone with your thoughts. What would you do now? What were you feeling. A part of you wanted to break up with Richie and stay with Law. But then you though it would be fair to work things out with Richie. Give him a chance. That was until small resentments crossed your mind. How he didn't seem willing to face the problems you were having, how he once said in the past he feared he wouldn't find you attractive if you gained much weight... What if that was the case? You were laying on the couch, your hands hiding your face, when you heard your cellphone buzzing. You thought of ignoring it, but you thought it could be Richie cancelling dinner, which kinda relieved you, so you decided to pick up. The name on the screen made you smile. It was just who you needed.

— Hi, big sis! Is your couch free for me to crash for a few days? — playfully said your sister on the other side of the line.

— Kikiiiiii! Of course it is! When will you arrive?

— I have somethings to do in town from tomorrow on. I guess I'll be there by tomorrow morning. I could stay at Mom's and Dad's, but I thought we could have some sister time. I miss you! — she said.