Paradigm Shift

Death wish

"Come on" Dean taunted as his two attackers stood over him. "Take your best shot!" Dean longed so much for pain that he almost craved it.

"This dude got a death wish or something?" One of his attackers asked in disbelief.

"Let's go man. He's got nothing we want anyway" the other attacker replied.

"Where are you going?" Dean asked as they walked away. "Is that all you've got?"

Dean got what he wanted. The two men turned around and as they continued their beat down Dean smiled. Hopefully, they would put him out of his misery once and for all.

"HEY!!...LEAVE HIM ALONE!"

A familiar voice called out and Dean groaned as he recognised who the voice belonged to. He heard his attackers run away, and he fought against a strong pair of arms as they pulled him to his feet.

"Dean, why didn't you fight back?'' Frederick's face showed no emotion as he waited for Dean to answer him

"What's it got to do with you?'' Dean asked bitterly

Frederick sighed as he listened to Dean's thoughts. "You were trying to get yourself killed!"

Dean laughed. "That is the correct answer. 10 points to Frederick"

"You know all too well Dean that being beaten up won't kill you" Frederick answered

"Oh, yeah...?" Dean stopped talking to spit out some blood that had gathered in his mouth. "well proves what you know''

Frederick's perfectly smooth face gave the slightest glimpse of emotion as he searched Dean's thoughts for an explanation. "You've been suppressing!?"

"So what if I have?" Dean asked.

Frederick used his incredible strength to guide Dean towards his car and as he sat down, Dean shut his eyes as he felt his wounds sting. Just being able to feel something again was bliss. Ever since he'd been transformed into a vampire, he'd been numb, both mentally and physically. He'd become a creature of pure appetite. Rational thought was no longer present. He only opened his eyes again once he heard the engine cut off, and he recognised he was now at Frederick's house. Frederick got out of the car and made his way around to Dean's side of the car.

Frederick opened the door. "We need to talk about what you are doing Dean"

Dean scoffed. "Do we? I don't see why"

Frederick moved towards his house and Dean watched on as he made his way inside, leaving him in the car. He considered sliding into the driver's seat and heading home, but then he realised Frederick had taken the keys with him, so he followed Frederick inside. Frederick was idly sipping out of what looked like a leather hip flask and he caught Dean's eye for just a moment as he passed him.

"I would offer you a drink, but I expect you are drinking anything but blood by this point" Frederick voiced as he watched Dean lean up against the kitchen counter opposite him

"You'd be right" Dean confirmed

"Did you finish the newborn phase before you suppressed?"

Dean was already over this conversation and the way Frederick was looking at him reminded him of the judging glare he used to receive from the school principal when he got in trouble. "What difference does that make?"

Frederick swallowed down the remains of what was in his hip flask before he answered "If you were still a newborn when you began suppressing then you would have to repeat the newborn phase once you consumed blood again"

"Who said I was going to drink blood again?" Dean asked "I don't plan ongoing back anytime soon"

Frederick stared at Dean for a moment. "The bathroom is down the hall to the left if you want to clean yourself up"

Dean made his way towards the bathroom and opened the cabinet above the sink, finding what he needed to tend to his wounds

"Of course, you would not need to do this if you had not suppressed" Frederick voiced as he appeared in the bathroom's doorway.

"Like I said. What's it got to do with you?" Dean replied.

Frederick's continuous calm was something that Dean found incredibly annoying, as was the way he continued to read Dean's mind so perfectly, which he was doing at that very moment

"It does not always feel that way, Dean. Vampires can feel emotions.
It is just that during the newborn phase, we only have one focus and that is to feed. It gets easier with time. However, by suppressing you are only delaying the inevitable. I can already tell that you are more irritable than usual and that will only get worse the longer you suppress"

"So it gets easier over time" Dean repeated. "But will I ever be able to see my friends and family again? Or do I have to live in the wilderness and hide away like some criminal for however long I may live?"

Frederick made his way back into the kitchen and towards the large fridge, bending down to retrieve what looked like a blood bag from the chilled area underneath

"I take it you still desire to be a vegetarian?" Frederick asked as Dean made his way back from the bathroom.

"Yeah. Not that it makes any difference now" Dean replied.

Dean studied the blood bag carefully as Frederick reached into a cabinet to grab a sipping cup. He ripped open the blood bag with his canines and emptied the thick liquid into the cup, shaking it vigorously before handing it over to Dean.

"If you drink this, I promise that within a few months you will be back to your old self again"

"I don't think so" Dean replied as he placed the cup down in front of him. "Nothing's that easy"

"I never said it would be easy Dean, but if you let me help you, I can get you to a place where you will live the life you want again" Frederick promised

"Oh, really?" Dean asked doubtfully "And how do you plan on doing that exactly?"

Frederick smiled. "You forget that I have been where you are now. If you allow me, I can help you. The first year of a vampire's life is by far the hardest, but if you work hard and stick to your goals, you can return to leading a relatively normal life"

Dean contemplated for a moment. Suppression was giving him what he had missed in the form of feeling again, but ultimately Frederick's was right. He was only delaying the inevitable, and it was only a temporary solution to a much bigger problem. Dean picked up the cup and opened the lid to sniff the contents. Animal blood smelt distinctively different to human blood, wrong somehow, not as fresh with an unpleasant, heady sweet aroma. He took a sip of the offensive smelling liquid and the flavour was wrong too, but the blood soothed his aching throat, so he continued to drink it down.

Frederick watched Dean carefully as he drank. "Animal blood never agreed with me. I have always preferred human. I admire your resilience, though. It certainly takes some getting used too"

Dean nodded. "Yeah. It's...different"

Dean drank the down the contents of the cup and wiped his mouth. He was still thirsty. That was new. Usually, his thirst was sated for at least an hour after drinking.

"Animal blood does not satisfy the same way human blood does, and it does not have the healing ability that its counterpart does" Frederick answered without Dean asking. "however, your body will get used to it and adjust accordingly"

Dean nodded. "Right. Well, I've done what you want, so now what?"

Frederick smiles ever so slightly. "Now the hard work begins"