Little Tiger

Three months of isolation

I called Shigure the day after Akito hit me, from the phone in the hallway, to relay the events to him in a garbled way. He kept asking me "Why?" and "What?" when he couldn't understand how one event led to the next. I evaded him by saying, "I wish I knew," to which he scoffed---either because of Akito's ludicrous behavior or because I had decided to call him and tell him what had happened without any substantial recollection of it---and said, "Alright, go on." 

I talked to him until he had to let me go because his mother was calling him. He promised to call me afterwards but when the phone rang again, assuming it was him, I didn't pick up. He was no help, anyway, and talking to him about it was only making me feel worse. Kureno had come out of his bedroom after the phone rang a second time. I heard his muffled voice in the hallway, conversing lowly with the person on the other end, then he slid my door open, poking his head inside with the receiver pressed against his chest. 

"Shigure wants to talk with you," he said pleasantly. 

I looked at him, shaking my head and mouthing, "Tell him I'm in the bath." His frantic head nod made it appear as if he were going to relay my message to Shigure, until he told him I'd be right there. 

I stood up and grabbed the phone from Kureno, glaring at him. He smirked and ruffled my hair before disappearing back to his room. 

"Ko, I'm sorry," he said. 

"It's alright," I told him, assuming he was apologizing for hanging up on me. 

"No, it's not. I shouldn't have been so reckless," he argued and I realized he wasn't talking about the phone call with his mother. 

"Oh," my voice trailed off, "It's not a big deal. Akito's not very strong," I replied with a humorless laugh. I didn't like it when people felt bad for me. I'd spent my whole life being apologized to: everyone offered me their condolences when my mother died, then when my father left, and then when I had to live in the main house. I believed I could handle myself and I didn't need others' pity so I hated it when they offered it. But I can be more honest with you than I am with Shigure, right? If this is true, I'll tell you that Akito really wasn't strong, but it was a different story when she was angry. I had to hold the receiver away from my cheek because it stung every time something came into contact with it. But, really, she wasn't strong.  

"Okay, well, at any rate, I'm sorry," he said after a short laugh. "Do you want me to tell Aya and Tori?"  he asked, his voice gentle in my ear, as if he were talking to a child. 

I shrugged, thinking he could see it through the phone. "Go for it," I told him. I didn't really want them to know but it seemed like they had a right to. Silence fell between us, I could hear Shigure's breathing and the quiet rustling of his notebook. "I won't be able to see you until summer break," I said finally. That was the only reason I had called him in the first place. It wasn't easy to say because admitting it out loud was like signing a contract in blood. 

Shigure sighed, the noise vibrating through the phone and into my ear. "Yeah?" he said doubtfully. "What's that? Like, three months from now?" He considered his math for a moment. "The three of us have to drop by soon to show Akito our grades," he said, his tone brightening. "It will only be two months after that, little tiger." 

I hated that name, but he had a way of making it sound so endearing. I don't know what I wanted his reaction to be, but it wasn't this. It felt like a block of ice had settled in my stomach, refusing to melt while he was perfectly fine. 

Shigure said my name when I didn't respond, wondering if I was still there. 

Tears from my eyes and I felt them drip down my face. I hadn't realized I was crying. "Mm-hmm," I replied, gripping the phone tightly. A lump settled in my throat that I couldn't quite swallow. "See you then," I added, trying to conceal the shakiness in my tone.