Infatuation || Anakin Skywalker

4.

One must let go of the past to hold onto the future.
- season 4 episode 19 The clone wars

I woke up early the next morning for training. My first time with Master Yoda. I wasn't sure how to feel. A part of me was excited to learn new things and the other part feels like I'm betraying my old Master. I had to ask around to see where Master Yoda was. He never actually told me where to go for this training. Finally someone's told me he is in his meditation room.

     I stood outside it and knocked waiting for a response. "Come in, my Padawan" He says and the door opens. He sat in his chair meditating. I walked inside and took the seat in front of him. "Mediation is a powerful thing, my padawan. When was the last time you meditated?" He asks still with his eyes closed.

"The night before my old Master died" I say honestly.

Master Yoda hummed at my response. "I want you to try"

     I cross crossed my legs and let my eyes close. I tried to let everything go. My mind was too busy. I couldn't shut out the thoughts like I normally could. I started to slow my breathing but even that didn't work. "Clear your mind, My Padawan" Yoda says slowly.

"I'm trying" I say. Anakin had said he would help me with that but we haven't gotten the chance to. I sigh and slowly shake my head.

...

"Ani-" I say when I saw Anakin in the halls. Me and Master Yoda spent two hours trying to meditate. It didn't work. It use to come so easy to me, but now it was pretty much impossible. He turns around and watches me as I run up to catch up to him. He stopped and waited for me to catch up. "How did your training go?" Anakin said as I finally caught up to him.

"About that..." I say with a smile. I knew I needed his help. Hoping if I practice some more I will finally get it right again. "Remember when you said you would help me meditate" I say with a smile knowing I'm about to ask him for something.

"I'll help, Athena. You don't need to even ask me" he says with a smile.

We walked back to her room to where she would be comfortable. I promised I would help her meditate and I attend to do that. The setting you're in has a lot to do with it, in my opinion. Makes it so much easier. The thought of us being in her room alone together also had a factor in my decision but I wasn't going to tell her that.

She quickly unlocked the door and I scanned the area to see if anybody was around. Technically, we aren't allowed into each other's rooms. Not that, that's ever stopped us before. I sighed seeing no one was around. She opened the door and I walked in behind her. I shut the door behind me and locked the door so no one could walk in.

"Sit on the bed, that will be the most comfortable" I say in suggestion. She does as I say and I couldn't help but smile a bit. I walked over and sat down in front of her close enough to where our knees touch. She looks up at me and I could see the slight blush that was on her face.

"Okay now, close your eyes" she does as I tell her and closed her eyes. "Good girl" I say lowly and bring my hand up to move a piece of hair that was in her face and tucked it behind her ear. I felt her soft skin beneath my fingers. Her icy white hair stood out against the room. I always loved her hair. It made her unique.

"You need to clear your mind. Imagine you're in a field, you can hear a waterfall in the background. Focus on that sound. Let it drown out your thoughts" I say trying to guide her. I could see the concentration on her face. I gave her a minute. To see if it was helping.

She sighed and shakes her head slowly. She opened her eyes and looked up at me in disappointment. I sighed "Let's try something else" I say since my first idea clearly didn't work.

She nodded and closed her eyes again. I brought my hand to her and wrapped her fingers in mine "Focus on my touch. Let it calm you." I say hoping this will work. My touch always had a calming effect on her and I hoped it worked now. My saw her breathing start to slow as she had a more calm expression on her face. Okay we're getting somewhere.

I keep her hands in mine as we sit in silence. I assumed since she had yet to say anything it was working. The old energy I used to feel around slowly became more apparent. She was letting her wall down. I didn't know if she was doing on purpose or not, but I wasn't going to stop her. It might be slightly selfish, but I wanted her to open her mind to me. I could now sense her emotions just like I could before she left.

I opened my mind up to her as well. Maybe her feeling my energy around her will help her. Her energy surrounds me. It felt amazing being able to feel her again. I was going to soak it up while I can. I knew she would most likely put her walls back up after we're done. I could sense her calmness, but I also sensed something else. I wasn't quite sure what it was. Wanting, maybe? No. That can't be it.

Fuck, I could get use to his touch. I wonder what else his hands could do. I snapped my eyes to her. Was that her thought? No it couldn't possibly be, but it also couldn't have been anybody else seeing as there's no body else around. I look at her curiously. Was she thinking about me? That thought of her thinking about somebody else made my heart tighten and not in a way I liked.

I wanted to test the theory. I decided I would indulge in this. Just to see. Just this once. I slowly untangle my fingers from her. I see her slightly squirm but I keep my hands on her. I slowly let my fingers run up and down her arms. "Is that helping?" I ask almost in a whisper.

She slowly nods her head and it makes me smile. I thought about her everyday since she left. Now I wasn't sure if I could ever let her go again. I wanted her with me. Where I can protect her. I know she can take care of herself but that natural instinct to protect her overrides being reasonable. I've had strong feelings for her ever since we were kids. Only now am I realizing just how far those feelings go.

I continued to rub my hands up and down her arms softly. The feeling of my hands touching her skin sent sparks up my hands. I begin to let my hands wonder further up her arms to her shoulders and across her neck. I felt goosebumps on her skin. She leaned into my touch and it made me smile.

     I continued to do this for what seemed like 30 minutes now. I only stopped once she slowly opened her eyes again. Her bright blue eyes seemed much calmer than before this, so that made me happy. She leaned into my touch that was on her neck. "Thank you, that helped a lot" she said softly. I brought my hand to slightly twirl her hair around in my fingers "How could I ever say no to a beautiful woman, like you?" I say looking into her eyes.

     After a few moments of playing with her hair I slowly pulled away. My body told me not to but I know I should before I do something I shouldn't. So I forced the feeling down. "Always a flirt" She responds with a smile which caused me to laugh a little. "Only for you" I say almost on a playful way, but I was serious. She is the only girl I ever thought about. Nobody can compare to Athena.

...

Okay so I slightly shorter chapter but they will probably get longer once I start writing the movies