𝔸 𝔾𝕙𝕠𝕤𝕥 𝕠𝕗 𝕎𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕎𝕒𝕤 𝕆𝕟𝕔𝕖 𝕄𝕚𝕟𝕖 𝕍.𝟚 💥𝔹𝕜𝔻𝕜💥

Chappter 21

⋅•⋅⊰∙∘☽༓☾∘∙⊱⋅•⋅

TO A CLOSE GOODBYE

Katsuki stood there, frozen for a beat, his mind reeling with shock and disbelief. What the hell just happened? He didn't know what to do or say, his heart still pounded in his chest as he realized he might have just ruined everything.

"Dammit!" The word exploded from his lips, the sound of his voice reverberating through the room. He was pissed, beyond pissed. He needed an outlet, something to punch, kick, explode. So, he lashed out at the nearest object—the kotatsu that now had a hole in it. His foot connected with a resounding thud. Every fiber of his being screamed for release, for the explosive power he harbored within, but he clenched his fists, holding back the tempest raging inside.

"Fucking hell, what have I done?" His voice was a hoarse whisper, his fingers tangling in his spiky hair as if they could unravel the mess in his fucking mind. He'd royally screwed up, and he knew it. But knowing didn't make it any easier to fix. He felt like crap, like he'd just blown everything he'd worked so hard for to hell.

After a few moments of standing there, he sucked in a deep breath and dragged himself to Izuku's room, his gut churning with nerves. He hesitated, his hand hovering over the door before he knocked softly, hoping against hope that Izuku would let him in.

No answer. Figures, Goddammit. He knocked again, louder this time, his voice a grumble as he muttered, "Come on, Deku. Open up."

Still nothing. Katsuki sighed heavily, he knew he had to give Izuku some space, but the thought of leaving things like this made him feel like absolute crap. He made his way back to his own room, slamming the door shut behind him, before flopping onto his bed, the weight of his screw-up nearly crushing him.

"What the fuck is wrong with me?" he growled, his fist pounding into the mattress in frustration. He felt like he'd completely lost control, and that was the worst feeling in the world. Because no matter how hard he tried, his shitty emotions always seemed to get the best of him, especially his anger.

He had spent the past month practically pouring his heart and soul into helping Izuku recover, pushing him to his limits and beyond in the hopes of seeing some semblance of the old Izuku shine through. But now when something shifted, he'd let his anger get the best of him, allowing his frustrations to boil over in a way that had only served to push Izuku further away.

He couldn't shake the image of Izuku's face from his mind, the hurt and anger seared into his memory like a brand. Why the hell would he say something like that to Izuku? He was such a Goddamn idiot.

Damn it, why did he always have to ruin everything? Why couldn't he just keep his damn mouth shut and let things be?

He lay there, seething, staring at the ceiling as if it held all the answers. He was pissed at himself. The guilt and regret were eating away at him, and he couldn't shake the feeling that he had irreparably damaged everything he was trying to build with Izuku.

But as much as he wanted to bury his head in the sand and pretend like everything was fine, he knew deep down that he couldn't keep his mouth shut about this. He couldn't shake the feeling that there was more to Izuku's behavior than met the eye, that there were demons lurking beneath the surface that neither of them fully understood. And until they were able to confront those demons head-on, they would never be able to move forward.

Katsuki closed his eyes and tried to push away the image of Izuku's hurt and angry face from his mind, but it refused to leave him alone. Before long, sleep found him, but it was a restless, haunted sleep.