True Colours

One year

I'm having a very hard time at the moment because my beloved mum is very ill. I will continue to post the story but I don't know if I can reply to comments at the moment. Please forgive me. I appreciate every single one and will catch up when I feel mentally able to. I'm not really the kind of person to share something like this publicly with everyone, but the exchange with my readers is always very important to me and when I reply to you I want to do it properly which I'm not able to do at the moment.
K.

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Louis is weird and has been for the last week. And Harry even has a guess. It's approaching their first anniversary and since what happened with Noah was such a crucial point and ended their non-relationship, his suspicion is that this is exactly what's bothering Louis.

Every day Harry makes even more sure that he tells Louis how much he loves him more than once, hardly leaves his side when they see each other, just wants to make Louis feel that he has absolutely nothing to fear. And it’s not like Louis doesn’t react to all of this, he cuddles back and smiles his best smile with every declaration of love. And yet it is as if he is only physically present but not mentally. Harry sees the looks Louis is giving him out of the corner of his eye, how he looks at Harry almost appraisingly and he seems to be considering whether Harry would end their relationship out of nowhere.

And Harry hates this unknown man a little more every time for it. He certainly wasn't even aware of how much he had influenced Louis with his behaviour back then and what insecurities lurked in his boyfriend as a result.

One day before their anniversary, he sits down on the sofa next to a pensive Louis and cuddles up to his side.

“Hey my love,” he tries to pull Louis out of his thoughts.

But Louis just turns his head and looks at him almost expressionlessly. It physically hurts Harry to see him like this and so he takes his hand and gives a kiss on top before holding it between his own two hands.

“Are you going on a date with me tomorrow? So we can celebrate our one-year anniversary?” he smiles at Louis.

Shrugging his shoulders, Louis looks below himself and doesn't seem very enthusiastic. "I don’t know."

“Talk to me, Louis. Because obviously something is bothering you and I'm tired of you avoiding my question about your bad mood all the time," Harry exclaims and can no longer contain his own frustration.

But he immediately regrets it when Louis suddenly puts his hands in front of his face and starts crying uncontrollably. At first Harry is too shocked to react but then he pulls him against his chest and strokes his back up and down.

“Shhh my love. All is well. Please tell me what's going on," Harry whispers, but Louis just shakes his head and doesn't seem to be able to answer right now.

Each of his sobs hits Harry right in the heart and he has no choice but to wait until he has calmed down somewhat.

"I'm so sorry darling," Louis hiccups, finally meeting his eyes.

Harry smiles crookedly and strokes his cheek. Despite his light blue eyes from crying, he finds Louis so beautiful that he can't help but kiss him gently.

“What are you sorry about, my love?”

"That... that I'm once again transferring my fears onto you, that tomorrow is literally taking my breath away... I... I can't lose you," Louis whispers and then his look becomes so pleading that that alone makes Harry's heart break again for his boyfriend. “I love you too much, please don’t leave me.”