Misery Loves Company

Will's Guide to Measuring Time

A/N So, I finally worked up the nerve to post this somewhere huh, let's see how this goes. I don't have an upload schedule sorry, I write when I can and when I have the inspiration but a fair bit of this fic is pre-written at least so as long as people are reading and interacting with it, I will try to update. Also, I am a perfectionist so I may go back and edit chapters if I see mistakes - hope that's okay. I don't have a beta reader and this is my first fic so kindness is appreciated <3

A/N2 Italics in the first chapter are excerpts from a letter, hopefully the formatting is okay, in future chapters this is not the case.

Will had always thought his most memorable day with Nico would be their wedding day.

He'd never told Nico, but he thought about that day a lot despite them having only dated for several months. He'd pictured the all-black suit Nico would wear, standing at the end of the aisle as Will walked down it with his mother at his arm. He'd thought about the flowers; having begun tending a patch of moonlace Percy had gifted him. He'd thought about it so frequently because it had to be perfect.

Because Will had always thought their memorable day would be their wedding day.

Not the day he left.

Will would come back to this day everyday for two years, pulling apart his memories trying to find a sign. But Nico had been quietly happy that day, his soft smile was no longer a rare sight and it lit up a room like glittering stars on a moonless night.

 Dear Will,

Will knew Nico still had bad days; days where he didn't see the sun, or his mind made him think he was only dreaming, convincing him that when he 'awoke' he'd be back suffering like he was during the wars. Nico didn't share much about those times, and Will knew better than to pry. The son of Hades had taken to talking with Mr. D which seemed to help; Will was grateful for that.

 I'm not good at apologies, you know that, but I owe you one. I'm not apologising for what  I've done but for the hurt it'll cause you. I should have seen this coming, the Fates must be laughing down at me from Olympus; I got attached, that was my mistake.

He'd had a good day the day before he left. Funny that was how he measured his life now, the before and the after. It used to be the wars that he used to measure the passage of time but there had been three of those now and he wasn't stupid enough to think another wouldn't come. So his life became divided into the before Nico, during Nico, and after Nico.

Why did there have to be an after?

I can't explain, truly it's better you don't know. I know you deserve an explanation, Gods you deserve someone who will stay with you. And I'm not that, I'm good at running, Will, you know that.

The last day of 'during Nico' , the day before he'd left, seemed like any other. Nico had sat at the Apollo table for breakfast Chiron didn't even give them a second glance anymore, and he'd eaten half his food which was more than usual. Will remembered little details like that even five years later. He could remember that he'd had toast with strawberry jam, cut in half diagonally because that's how Bianca used to do it. But he was forgetting the colour of his eyes. Were they the deep black-brown of squid ink or were they closer to home-brewed coffee?

He'd spent the morning in the infirmary with Will since after the war he'd taken to helping Will, though he rarely said a word to any of the campers who came in. Nico had always thought the campers were unnerved by him, looking back Will knew he was right, but all those years ago Will would just hug him close and tell him his mind was lying to him, that he was loved and wanted at Camp Half-blood.