Loving you for real (Kudo Shinichi/ Edogawa Conan x reader)

Chapter 11

I dragged my feet towards Agasa Hakase's house. The dreaded moment of staying away from Conan was approaching, and the only thing that kept me walking was the fact that I was holding Conan's hand. It's warm. It reminds me of the day we turned into children and ran to Agasa Hakase's house hand in hand. 

Then I realised how dependent I was on Conan's existence. I'd do things that I wouldn't usually do because I wanted to be around him - even if it meant that I'd get trauma from seeing crime scenes. Even if it meant that I'd have to have nightmares and struggle to sleep. 

Now that I think about it, after I woke up from my nightmare, I struggled to go back to sleep because my head was busy being mindful of the fact that Conan was so near me while holding my hand. Not because of my nightmare... Is my brain focusing on what I like on purpose to avoid the trauma?

Using a person to stay sane...

That's... A bit unhealthy? Isn't it? 

Perhaps that's the reason why I didn't focus so much on why or how I teleported to this universe. Ah. I meant anime. 

We arrived at a convenience store, and Ran suddenly suggested bringing snacks, fruits, and drinks to Agasa Hakase's house. 

Then I felt a light tug on my hand. I turned to Conan with a confused look to see that he was already looking at me with a slightly worried expression. He then turned to Ran and insisted that the AC in the convenience store was too powerful so he would stay outside, dragging me with him. Ran eyed us for a second before grinning, giggling to herself before looking around the store. 

Conan and I closed the door behind us. I looked around to see no one was near before whispering to him. "What's wrong?" as he frowned back. 

"What's bothering you?" he mumbles.

"Eh?" I struggled to find an excuse until I remembered what Conan said to me earlier, right after we left the Mori estate: "It's because I worried about going to Agasa Hakase's house. I'm feeling a bit nervous about meeting a stranger."

He looks at me blankly, as if he were analysing my face before sighing and looking forward, letting go of my hand to stretch his arms. Conan replied to me, but he didn't face me: "Ah. The excuse I used earlier in front of Ran to make it so that you wouldn't feel awkward."

I blinked rapidly. 

"What.?"

He turned back with an "I know what's going on" look. 

"I only butt in saying that Agasa Hakase is a good man to ease the tension, make it seem like you're nervous about meeting a stranger. Whatever that's on your mind is probably personal. Something you can't talk about in front of Ran."

I stare at him bewilderedly before mumbling, "The thing on my mind could've actually been something small that I don't mind telling Ran."

Conan crosses his arms before mumbling, "You only bottle up stuff that we can't talk about."

"Haah? That's not true."

"Yeah, you do." He opened his mouth, then paused and closed it again. 

I raise my eyebrows, watching him as he faces away from me with slightly pink cheeks. 

"Besides..." He sighs, changing the topic, regaining composure, "You've already met Agasa Hakase, so that was a bad excuse on my part. I panicked and spouted whatever I could. But Ran knows that you've met him already, so he shouldn't be a stranger to you."

"When did I meet Ag-"

"When she came over to my house the day we turned into children." Conan turns back to look at me with a small sigh. "It should be fine, though. Ran probably brushed off my words. I mean... It is your second time meeting him, so it does make sense for you to feel at least a bit nervous."