Life is...Love, Family, Friendship

Maya's Choice

Carina had left Maya's phone on the table by her bed when she went with Vic. Andy heard it buzz and looked over to see who it was. 'Rachel-CPS' was displayed. Andy had half a mind to answer it, but decided to leave it alone. A minute later, the voicemail icon lit up. Andy leaned on the side of Maya's bed.
"Hey, you better heal fast. You missed a call from CPS, that means they are calling Carina right now. I'm going to bet you guys are getting Liam permanently."
She grabbed her friend's hand and gave it a squeeze. Andy and Maya had been through so much together. Being an only child, Andy only had her cousin Michelle until that was taken away from her for so long. She was so grateful that they had reconnected and that things were going so well.
But Maya, Maya had been Andy's ride or die sister for so long now that it was much deeper of a connection than just friends and co-workers. Maya was her sister and one of her role models on how to make firefighting look easy. They had brought out the best and worst in each other, never giving up on their friendship-even when it seemed doomed to fail.
"You remember when you took us onto that camping trip? The 'team bonding' exercise? I wanted to choke the living shit out of you and I honestly think that if I had the entire team would have helped me dispose of your body. Do you know that it was during that trip that I finally understood how you could both love and hate having a sister? Maya, I need you to be ok, I need my sister back. We have so much we need to accomplish together. And I need to get in line behind your wife to kick your ass when you are back up on your feet."
Andy smiled and squeezed Maya's hand just as the door opened and Carina and Vic came in. Carina looked refreshed and Andy smiled seeing her in Maya's SFD sweats. She had stolen them from Maya the night of the Space Needle fire and everyone had joked how Carina looked better in them than Maya did. Andy got up from the chair so Carina could sit but Carina leaned over and kissed Maya before putting her mouth to her wife's ear and whispering something. Andy looked at Vic who was doing a piss poor job of hiding a smile.
"Ok, what's going on you two?"
Vic clamped her hands over her mouth and shook her head before pointing to Carina.
"Come on, spill it! Does it have anything to do with the lady from CPS calling Maya's phone a few minutes ago?"
Carina stood up, looked at Vic and pointed her finger. Vic looked ready to burst so Carina let out a sigh.
"Bene! Tu vinci! Go ahead and tell her, but not one other person, capire?"
"Oh my God they are getting Liam!"
"What?! Oh my God that is soooo awesome!"
Andy grabbed Carina in a hug as Vic bounded over and hugged them both.
"Oh Carina, this is so awesome! You know I heard Maya saying that Liam is our newest probie since he was at the house fire-"
Andy cut herself short as the words left her mouth and she realized what she said. Carina's smile was suddenly trying hard to hold on as she fought back tears. She took at deep breath and exhaled loudly.
"No,no it's ok. I'm ok. Maya is going to be ok. This is just temporary and now that we are going to actually get Liam, we need to celebrate. How long before he gets here?"
The knock at the door couldn't have been better timed. Vic opened it and Michelle came in holding Liam. Carina's smile could have lit the entire universe as she reached out for him. Taking him in her arms, Carina went and sat next to Maya's bedside and nuzzled him as Andy ushered everyone out.
"Let's give this family some alone time."

"Can you feel that?"
Maya looked at Andrew, her eyes wide. That feeing she'd had when she saw Carina before was back, but it was even more intense. Maya put her hand to her chest and felt her heart beating.
"What's going on? Why am I feeling like this?"
Andrew stood up and motioned for Maya to do the same.
"That's true bliss Maya. It's the feeling you get when you embrace the ultimate moment of acceptance. But be careful, because here when you experience it, sometimes it gets mistaken for wanting to move on."
"Move on? I don't understand?"
"When I got here, Doctor Grey was here. She was in the same spot of life you are right now out there. She sat with me, like I am with you, and she explained so many things to me. I felt the bliss and she told me that I had to choose between embracing it in that moment or leaving it right here and going back where I would have to face the pains of life."
"And you embraced it. That's why Carina lost you that day."
"My sister has never lost me Maya, she just felt the pain of me choosing to live in the bliss. And unfortunately we can't share the living world with the blissful one."
"That's why we grieve isn't it?"
"Yes. But in grief, love blossoms. My sister had your love to keep her safe through that time. You kept her safe when I needed to move on."
"But I fucked it all up too. I didn't admit to myself or anyone else what was happening to me. I-I hurt her so badly Andrew...I almost lost her."
The warmth suddenly sucked out of Maya's chest and she felt a cold sensation across her skin. She looked at Andrew with terror in her eyes.
"What's happening to me?"
"You are getting close to having to make your choice Maya. It's not going to be easy, but I'm confident you will know what to do."
"My choice? My choice is always going to be Carina."
"I know, but take my hand and let me show you something."
Maya grasped Andrew's outstretched hand and in a flash the beach they had been on was replaced and they were standing outside Maya and Carina's house. Andrew pointed to the window and as Maya looked inside, she could see Carina, looking older but still stunningly beautiful, sitting in a chair as a dark haired man placed a baby in her lap. She began singing softly and Maya heard Andrew quietly singing along. From the next room, another man and woman came in, Maya could see they were twins, their blonde hair and facial features caused Maya to blink. They came and sat near Carina and all of them looked so happy. Carina turned her head and looked up at the bookcase behind her and Maya followed her gaze. There was the framed picture of her and Carina on their wedding day, holding each other, their eyes locked in true love's gaze. Maya smiled remembering that that was the moment nothing else existed in the universe-only her and Carina. Her eyes wandered to the left of the picture and she saw the urn, polished brass with the SFD logo emblazoned on it. And on the other side of it was Maya's official portrait in her Class A uniform.
"Andrew, what is this?"
"This is you embracing the bliss Maya."
"But, those people, who are they? The boy and girl, they look-they look so much like Mason and I. And that man who gave Carina the baby, he-he-is that Liam?"
Andrew smiled and nodded.
"I'm confused though, how-what does this mean?"
"Maya, if you embrace the bliss, you will be with my sister forever, just like we are here now. You will be able to see everything, from this side. Carina is happy and healthy and has been blessed with children because of you."
"But I won't be there, not THERE where they are."
"True, but you will be free of all the pain and suffering you carry inside you every day."
Maya let go of Andrew's hand and the image disappeared and they were back on the beach where this had all begun.
"I can't leave her alone. I choose the pain. At least I will be with Carina and our family."
Andrew smiled.
"Brava Bella, sono orgoglioso di te."
"Now what?"
"Now we just sit here a bit longer and enjoy the view."