Painfully yours

Denial.

Arya's P.O.V.
_________

I woke up with the driest mouth I had ever experienced, a parched sensation that made swallowing feel like a challenge. As I slowly fluttered my eyes open, the spinning in my head intensified, signaling a brutal hangover. Every movement I made seemed to vibrate through my dehydrated body, leaving me feeling weak and unsteady.

The feverish cold that enveloped me only added to the discomfort, causing me to shiver despite the layers of blankets covering me. My mind felt foggy and sluggish, making it difficult to focus or think clearly. The combination of dehydration, dizziness, and the pounding headache left me feeling utterly miserable and regretful of the events that had led to this state.

As I tried to gather my thoughts and muster the strength to get up, I couldn't help but long for a glass of water to soothe my dry throat and alleviate the throbbing ache in my head. The physical and mental toll of the hangover weighed heavily on me, a stark reminder of the consequences of overindulgence.

I squeezed my eyes shut, hoping to alleviate the throbbing pain in my head and the spinning sensation that made me feel even more nauseous. As I tried to piece together the fragmented memories from the night before, a diamond encrusted X caught the sunlight coming from the window. It was a bracelet in my hand, flashes of Xavier's assault, the date, the bracelet, the water, the boat, that guard and Xavier wiping the water off my face slowly flooded my mind in a chaotic whirlwind.

The realization hit me like a ton of bricks as I recalled Xavier changing my clothes. Panic surged through me as I struggled to comprehend the implications of his actions. My heart raced with fear and uncertainty, wondering what else he might have done while I was in a vulnerable state.

He changed me out of my underwear, cleaned my face and slept with me. The memory of Xavier's seemingly caring gestures now took on a sinister undertone, leaving me feeling violated and extremely violated. I felt shattered, by a deep sense of betrayal and violation.

How could have I let this happen?
Why did I drink when I knew Xavier was a threat?
It's all my fault . I let my self walk in a situation I could've avoided.
But how?
Avoiding him was getting difficult and it's all that consumed my mind lately. He was just rude and invasive and so dominating.

I thought that this torture would be over yesterday. Yet her was here , once again in my safe space, exploiting the safe and exhausting another space for me. Xavier didn't even understand me. He almost never gave me a chance to defend myself or to save myself He just keeps attacking me and for what? He just forces his company on me and even if I try to put up with it, he makes it all the more harder with his sexual advances I hated his touch on my cheek, shoulders, neck and my jaw or my ankles . He thinks I'm not going to tell anyone but he's wrong .

I'll tell dad. I was nervous about having to narrate the situations but all of them seemingly overtly sexual. What will I tell him? I let him change my clothes? I could've fought back . I tried to think hard if I did put up a fight and the memory got lost in a throbbing head but no such memories came.

I should tell him about the slaps. Suddenly a tingling erupted in my stomach signaling the arrival of my biggest fear. What if he found out and did something even more hurtful to me. He was very capable. But if I had to put it to end for good , I had to speak up.

I felt a shiver run up and down my spine as she realized I had caught a cold. The cold air around me seemed to echo Xavier's icy intentions, making each moment a painful reminder of his cruelty. Despite being drenched, Xavier had purposefully made me suffer in the cold for defying him. He didn't care that I was not in a condition to sit in the cold yet for his own satisfaction of finishing our conversation.