Painfully yours

Texts.

Arya's P.O.V
_________

As I sat by the window sill, wrapped in my cozy fur blanket, I found solace in the atmosphere created by the rain spattering against the window and the occasional lightning strikes in the sky. I had worn a long sweater that went down to my thighs without shorts because I was loving the soft chafing today. I had applied a new water based skin serum and my thighs felt soft against each other. The ambiance was perfect, and I couldn't help but long for a coffee or wine. Maybe both? Espresso martini. I called the chef to ask for one and some truffle French fries.

I had spent the entire day studying, preparing for an exam that was just two days away. The week had been quiet, with no distractions from my phone. I intentionally kept my distance from it, not wanting any interruptions, the fanfage apparently kept me on my toes wanting to know what random strangers on the Internet said about me. Some thought I was horrible and some just tried to support fighting negativity in the comments. Xavier had called me over two hundred times, but I refused to even glance at my phone. I just needed some time. I had immersed myself into text books.

There were moments when I missed him, but there were also times when I felt anger towards him for keeping the truth about me hidden. It was becoming increasingly difficult to imagine how I would face him. I had instructed my house manager to ensure that Xavier didn't have access to me, resulting in a constant turnover of staff. I knew he was firing anyone who was in cahoots with me, but I didn't care even though I knew that house manager would disappear in some days and be replaced by a new one. Thankfully the new one wouldn't suspect me to be an actual thief.

I had been numb all week, and the desire to see him was both overwhelming and painful. Part of me wanted to ignore him, to give him a taste of his own medicine, but it tasted like ass to me, the thought of not being able to see him was more agonizing than anything else but only for sometime. Sometimes I hated him with every fibre in my being.

As I indulged in the delicious espresso martini and fries that Elina had delivered to my room, I couldn't help but engage in the food with gusto unable to resist truffle. Elina and I had started talking recently, and she would often share stories of her home while I would occasionally share stories about my friends. Honestly I didn't like her because of what happened on the night of arrest. She didn't warm me or was concerned, just doing her job for Xavier.

Although I enjoyed the solitude, I couldn't help but miss everyone. My parents, Ariana , Tricia , Grace and obviously Xavier. The weather outside had created such a cozy atmosphere, and I wanted to savor it a little longer. I decided to put on some music and started swaying and twirling in my room, fully embracing the moment. Whenever I finished a drink, I would call for more, immersing myself in the tranquil of Lana del Rey's voice and the rain. Everytime the sky lit up with lightnings I stood still to watch it. I loved every aspect of nature. At this point I wished I had a Benny of my own. Benny reminded me of Ruhaan who now reminded me of Xavier again. He had managed to become a part of all of me that was back in India and is here in Zurich.

Xavier's Richard Mille always adorned my wrist, holding memories of our time together in Delhi. I had developed a liking for it, despite the complicated feelings I had towards Xavier. Both my wrists were clasped in his accessories and it kind of made me feel taken and giddy but at the same time I was repelled by how he had managed to fucking solder a bracelet on me that I was never able to take off. He had left countless messages, pleading for me to let him in or to talk to him, some even containing threats saying it wasn't wise to do so or that punishments were awaiting me. Part of me wished he would follow through with those threats just so I could see him again and have marks adorn my body again. I had spent a lot of time just caressing the marks below my belt. They stung so good , I would be lost in the sensation for hours and not one time was I triggered or thought about that disgusting fool of a teacher.