Oops, My Boyfriend

第8章

The day I headed home for winter break, I planned for a dramatic farewell, lacking grand gestures but at least a bit of lingering affection.Instead, it turned out like this.He said, "Don't go falling for any pretty boys."I replied, "Is there any pretty boy with a face whiter than yours?"He scoffed, "That's true."I clapped my hands mockingly, "Ooh, I've seen all kinds of your smiles, and finally, a cold one shows up."He glanced at me, "Stop clapping, you sound like a female gorilla."...Mother of God, the sentimental farewell I'd been brewing since the day before yesterday was completely ruined.Back at home, opening the door didn't bring the warm embrace of spring.Instead, my mom was sitting there with a stern face, staring me down.I almost knelt down, "Mom, I'm your beloved daughter!"My mom scoffed, lifting one side of her mouth, "Beloved daughter? Which beloved daughter keeps a relationship secret for half a year? Look how sweet you were as a child, always telling me everything. And now? Not a word about your love life, your grad school applications, nothing. What did I raise you for?"My mom glared at me, I glared at my sister, my sister glared at my dad, and my dad looked plaintively at my mom.A perfect square of familial tension.Dealing with my sister would come later; the priority was a heartfelt explanation to mom.I said, "Mom, I didn't tell you about the relationship because I didn't want to worry you. If there was really something wrong, wouldn't I have told you?"I clutched my chest, "Mom, the first thing that lights up my life is the sun, and the second is you."My mom waved dismissively, "Stop with the sweet talk. What's he like?"It took me half an hour to describe Caleb—from his appearance to his hobbies, from his family background to his ambitions.By the end, I was surprised at how well I knew him.My mom pondered for a long while, then dropped a bombshell, "Audrey, hold on to him tight and never let go!"I shoved my sister into her room, "What's going on with you? Trying to overthrow your sister? Told you not to tell anyone, yet you blabbed? Are you a sieve?"My sister stepped back, "Wow! Seems your boyfriend is no ordinary guy. You've only been with him a short while, and your mouth is sharper than a Gillette razor."Just as I was feeling proud, I remembered I needed her to confess her crimes.She explained, "That day at home, I had a few drinks with dad, shared some heartfelt stories. I guess I was drunk, so I accidentally sold you out, but I begged him not to tell mom..."I suddenly remembered an old saying from martial arts movies: "Only the dead can keep a secret."That night, I video chatted with Caleb on Skype.I didn't have a webcam, so he couldn't see me.I had just said, "The weather is nice today," "Looking forward to the Spring Festival Gala," and "Can't wait for school to start again," when he asked, "What's wrong with you?"Truly a wise man.What's wrong with me.On his end, he couldn't see the three extra heads poking around me, staring intensely at his handsome face.I told the three nosy onlookers behind me to back off a bit, "Move back, it's getting hot here."Then I told Caleb, "The moon is so bright tonight, be careful with your words."After a pause, he typed a message.I clicked it open, and the chat box displayed: "Hello Uncle and Auntie 😊" with a smiley face, and he was smiling gently on his video feed.My parents jumped up and hurried away, my mom muttering, "He can't see us, right? He can't see us, right?"I sent my sister away and asked him, "Darling, miss me?"He replied: "Have your parents left?"I said: "Yes. How did you know they were here?"He said: "Your topics seldom involve such bright things as the moon."I replied: "If you were here now, I'd knock you out!"He responded: "If that's the case, I'd gladly take it."See, that's the difference between a novice and a pro.A few words from him, and I felt like I was marinated in a jar of honey. Even if buried alive, I'd still be happy!