America's POV:
I awoke in the morning and found out I crushed my sunglasses. I groaned. That was my last pair. I looked at myself in the mirror as a pure black and blue eye stared back at me. I couldn't go to the meeting like this, I would have to order more fast. I walked downstairs and made myself a piece of toast. In all honesty, I wasn't really hungry but knew I would be later. All my kids were asleep, which was surprising since DC and New York probably had insomnia.
I placed an Amazon order for 20 pairs of sunglasses. I called in sick to the meeting and laid in my bed until Hawaii came into my room. "Daddy, you been in bed forever. Do you not love us?" She said with wide eyes. I chuckled and kissed her forehead, "I just feel sick, honey." I said. She nodded and laid in bed next to me. I wasn't going to admit it, but she was my favorite kid. I fell asleep at some point and heard a knock on the door.
I got up untangling myself from Hawaii. I opened the door to my house, tired. When I saw who was outside, I covered my eyes immediately, but it was too late. It was the UN and a few countries. They stood in shock at my eyes. "Frick." I mumbled. I decided to let them in because they already knew. One of my kids started hugging my leg and looked at the countries. "Daddy, who are they?" Oh, it was Alaska. "My boss and a few other countries." I answered. She hid back behind my legs, peaking every once in a while. "Why does she look kind of like Russia?" China asked. I sigh, "Long story." I said. Alaska gets excited, "Can I tell the story, Daddy?" She said excitedly. I nodded. "Back before I appeared, I was a territory of Mr. Russia's grandfather, but before I could appear, Daddy bought me, and I'm biologically his daughter now. But technically, I'm Mr. Russia's aunt, but not really." Alaska explained. I scratched the back of my neck, "Yeah, that's basically it." I said.
Canada tilted his head, "You have more kids, right?" He asked, I nodded. UN looked curious, "Where are they?" He asked. I shrugged, "Probably in the 2nd living room." I said. I led them to the 2nd living room where some of the kids were doing karaoke.
Divorced, beheaded, and died
Divorced, beheaded, survived
"Kids," I said.
I'm Henry the eighth, I had six sorry wives
"Kids!" I said a little louder.
Some might say I ruined their lives
"CHILDREN!" I yelled. My kids looked over at us, shocked. "Omg, more countries!" Pennsylvania said excitedly. Most of my kids came downstairs besides the territories, and they looked at the countries. "Wait, what are their names?" Britain asked. Delaware got excited this time, "We can finally do the song!" He said. The states nodded, and they lined up in state hood order. I pulled up a chair and sat. DC started the music, and I internally groaned. The kids started to do a choreographed dance.
Fifty Nifty United States from thirteen original colonies,
Fifty Nifty stars in the flag that billows so beautifully in the breeze.
Each individual state contributes a quality that is great!
Texas glared at California.
Each individual state deserves a bow: Let's salute them now!
California glared at Texas.
Fifty Nifty United States from thirteen original colonies,
Shout 'em, Scout 'em, Tell all about 'em,
One by one, 'til we've given a day to every state in the U.S.A
Alabama stepped forward so he could say his name.
Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Arkansas, California, Colorado, Connecticut
Delaware, Florida, Georgia, Hawaii, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana
Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maine,
Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan.
Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada,
New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York,
North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio,
Oklahoma, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Carolina,
South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas,
Utah, Vermont, Virginia, Washington, West Virginia, Wisconsin, Wyoming
YOU ARE READING
APUSH kids on crack (A Rusame story)
FanfictionCredit to the artist: My friend wanted me to write this skibidi story, so here is a story. America is a tired dad, and Russia is a suicidal alcoholic.
