*Most of it is just Alastor failing to flirt 😔
~~
Idk lol I feel like he'd threaten Luci to be safe or something and obviously he didn't.
Alastor: Oh come on, you wouldn't hurt a fly.
Lucifer: You're right, because a fly is an innocent creature.
Lucifer: You on the other hand, I would maim.
~~
Alastor, trying to flirt: Hey asshole. So, you come around here often?
Lucifer, confused: I mean, this is my house, so yeah.
~~
Alastor: You have a face.
Lucifer: ...yes? Yes I do have a face.
Alastor: I mean you have a nice face.
Lucifer: Thanks? I think??
Alastor: Please understand that I'm trying to flirt with you, I have no idea what I'm doing.
~~
Lucifer: [running towards Alastor with open arms]
Alastor: [moves out of the way]
Lucifer: Hey, why'd you move?!
Alastor: I thought you were going to attack me!
Lucifer: I was going to hug you!
Alastor: Why would you hug me?
Lucifer: WHY WOULD I ATTACK YOU!?
~~
Alastor after hearing that Lucifer likes flowers.
Alastor: If you were a flower I'd pick you.
Lucifer: Which would kill me.
Alastor: I'd water you constantly.
Lucifer: So I'd drown.
Alastor: I'll put you in the sunniest spot.
Lucifer: So I'd wither up and die.
Alastor: I'm trying my best here Lu.
~~
Lucifer and Alastor after their argument.
Lu, pointing to a cup on a high shelf: Hey, can you get that for me?
Al, being his petty self: Oh, so you do need me in your life huh?
Lu: I can and will replace you with a step-ladder.
~~
Luci: The difference between us is that I do nothing to try and hide my clinginess, while you pretend it's a coincidence that you're with me 99% of the time.
Al: The fact that I'm holding your hand right now means nothing.
~~
Alastor: Well we both look handsome tonight.
Lucifer: You know if you had said I looked handsome, I would've replied "so do you"
Alastor: I couldn't take that chance.
~~
Lucifer, to Alastor: Pros and cons of dating me.
Alastor: Pros. You'll be the cute one.
Alastor: cons, omg where do I even start?"
~~
(If Lucifer had white instead of yellow lol)
Alastor, giving Lucifer flowers: They match your eyes.
Lucifer: These are lilies. They're white.
Alastor: That's like most of your eyes.
~~
Charlie: If I fall...
Vaggie: I'll be there to catch you.
Angel: *looks at Husk* What if I fall?
Husk: Then I'll fall with you, never leaving your side.
Lucifer: *watches these two interactions*
Lucifer, to Alastor: And if I fall?
Alastor: I'll be the one who pushed you.
~~
YOU ARE READING
Helluva/Hazbin steuff
FanfictionLiterally just me yapping about Hazbin Hotel or rambling about Helluva Boss I started feeling bad about updating my oneshot book on other stuff and not oneshots, so here ya go Uhh yea! :D
