Today I was in the studio again recording more of my songs. I had at least two more.
"Uncle John?" I asked while we were waiting for the producer to come back.
"Yeah?" he said.
"One of the songs I have to sing today, needs a male vocal. Would you sing it with me?" I asked.
"Sure thing baby." he said.
"You're gonna do great babe. You always do." Joe said on the other side of me.
"Thanks." I said.
When we got into the studio, we decided to do the song that uncle John was gonna sing with me.
ME: Piercing words, eyes are red. Watched your tail lights in the rain. Empty heart filled with regret, I know we were both to blame. And I'm not sorry that it's over but for the way we let it end. So I said all I had to say in letters that I threw away. And you should know. Please believe me. I've picked up the phone a thousand times and tried to dial your number but it's been so long. It's never easy. It's like tryin to spin the world the other way. What can I say?
UNCLE JOHN: How did it come to this?
BOTH: I think about you all the time.
UNCLE JOHN: It's no excuse but I wish that I never made you cry. And I'm not sorry that it's over but for the way we let it end.
BOTH: I couldn't find the words to say. And you should know. Please believe me. I've picked up the phone a thousand times and tried to dial your number but it's been so long. It's never easy. It's like tryin to spin the world the other way.
ME: So what can I say?
UNCLE JOHN: What can I say?
ME: What can I say?
UNCLE JOHN: What can I say? I hate to think all you have of me is a memory. I loved you.
ME: I said all I had to say.
UNCLE JOHN: The space between what was meant to be and the mess that it turned into.
ME: In letters that I threw away. And you should know. Please believe me.
BOTH: I picked up the phone a thousand times and tried to dial your number.
ME: But it's been so long.
BOTH: It's never easy. It's like tryin to spin the world the other way.
UNCLE JOHN: It's like tryin to spin the world the other way.
ME: What can I say? What can I say?
UNCLE JOHN: What can I say?
**
When the music stopped I hugged uncle John. It was amazing to sing with him.
The next song I had to sing was I Just Can't Live A Lie.
The music started.
"Lately nothing I do ever seems to please you and maybe turning my back would be that much easier. Cause hurtful words are all that we exchange but I can't watch you walk away. Can I forget about the way it feels to touch you? And all about the good times that we've been through? Could I wake up without you every day? Would I let you walk away? No I can't learn to live without and I can't give up on us now. Oh I know I could say we're through and tell myself I'm over you. But even if I made a vow, I promise not to miss you now and try to hide the truth inside I'd fail cause I, I just can't live a lie. Could I forget the look that tells me that you want me? And all the reasons that make loving you so easy? The kiss that always makes it hard to breathe. The way you know just what I mean. No I can't learn to live without. Oh so don't you give up on us now. Oh I know I could say we're through and tell myself I'm over you. But even if I made a vow, I promise now to miss you now and try to hide the truth inside I'd fail cause I, I just can't live a lie. Oh and I don't wanna try. Oh I know I could say we're through and tell myself I'm over you. But even if I made a vow, I promise not to miss you now and try to hide the truth inside I'd fail cause I, I just can't live a lie. I just can't live a lie. But even if I made a vow, I promise not to miss you now and try to hide the truth inside I'd fail cause I, I just can't live a lie. Oh I can't live a lie. Oh I can't live a lie."
The music ended and I looked at the faces of the men behind the glass and they just smiled at me. I really was gaining confidence and I truly was proud of myself.
***
We were done recording all of the songs and we just sat there talking. "So what's next?" I asked.
"Well, we put together the album and then the album comes in and when it does we talk about your tour dates and your live performances. I know you're a wrestler so it'll be pretty tricky to work around that. If you want, you could just get your music out there and do live performances every now and then. You just probably won't have as much feedback as most artists who tour. It's all up to you." the producer said.
"I don't wanna tour. Wrestling is my passion and it's what I've wanted to for a long time. I'm not gonna give up on it. I sing on the side sometimes and I write songs on the side. It's just what I do. I'm not made to tour for music. I'm made to tour for wrestling with my loving husband." I said.
"That's perfectly fine. Like I said, it's up to you. If you choose not to then we'll make the feedback you get good enough. You should be okay. I promise. I'm gonna take good care of your music." he said.
"Thank you so much." I said.
We walked out and Joe and I were alone. "You were amazing in there."
"Thank you. And thank you for getting me to do this. It feels good to know that people are actually gonna hear my music. I love you so much." I said.
"I love you too." he said.
"Let's go home to our kids."
We walked out of the studio.
