Don't Forget Me

5. your heart knows the truth

"life goes on, days get brighter."
~ mac miller

A few days later, it was a rainy Sunday. I sat in my room and watched the individual raindrops as they ran down on the window. I looked on the streets, the rain was so much that some streets were overflowing. I looked around in my room, I loved the sound of the rain. It was so calm, so peaceful, so beautiful. The rain reminded me of Luca and how often we just watched every single raindrop running down the window. Mostly we were in his room and watched the rain while I laid in his bed and enjoying the sounds the rain made. It was peaceful and I easily could fall asleep. He always watched me almost falling asleep and tickled me because he never wanted me to sleep. I smile as the memories came back, on some days I missed him more that I was thinking that maybe everything was my fault. We shouldn't have drove on the highway while we argument. We shouldn't have argument about something like that, I should have told him the truth. I sighed, now it was to late for every confession I could have made to him. He knew I sometimes had problems or bad days but he never gave up on me. Never until that day.
"I can't tell you!... its complicated"
"Lilith please.."
My dad this word stucked on my tongue
"Lilith please... we can't keep argumenting"
He was right...
I sighed and rubbed my eyes. Sometimes I can still hear his voice, I can still see him... I bited my cheek and rubbed my eyes. Please just get out of my head. I sighed and kept watching the rain as my phone ringed. A call from Silas.

I smiled and sat down on my bed as I answered the phone. "Hey." He smiled and looked through the screen at me, a big smile on his face. "Hi" I smiled back and looked at his dirty blonde messy hair.
We both didn't said a word for maybe 5 minuts we just stared at each other and smiled. I don't know why but around him everything felt different, so comforting and peaceful. I felt so safe. All the thoughts about Luca or the accident suddenly flew away and the only thing that mattered right now was to get my mind clear from everything and when I was with Silas it felt so easy. "Why were you calling?" I asked a few minuts later after we stared at each other. He had a bright smile on his face as his ears turned slightly pink, I chuckle. "I... just bored." He said as his ears got red. I laughed a little and smiled.

We kept talking for hours as suddenly my phoned got a message. It was my father. I sighed and clicked on the message.

Dad: probably won't come home today, it's raining too much and the streets are flooded.

I stared at the message for a few seconds before I left it on read. My father drove today's morning to work in the next big city two hours away from here. I tried to get his message out of my head to get my attention back to Silas but somehow it didn't work.
probably won't come home...
it's raining....
streets are flooded....
I sighed and closed my eyes for a moment and laid down next to my phone so Silas couldn't see me. I stayed like that for a few more minuts until Silas got me out of my thoughts. "So what about Thursday?"
I grabbed my phone and looked at him "Thursday?" He chuckled "Thursday evening in the cinema. The new movie you wanted to watch.... did you even listened to me the last few minuts?" I looked at my phone in silence as my cheeks turned pink he laughed. "It's okay, so are you free Thursday?" He looked in his mirror trying to fix his hair. I chuckled "Thursday sounds good."

We kept talking until late at night as Silas had to hang up. I laid in my bed the rain still outside. I sighed and closed my eyes thinking about everything that happened today. All the thoughts, Silas call, Dad's message, everything went through my head. I looked at the ceiling and noticed the little heart I once drew as Luca was with me. Me and him always had the craziest ideas and because we never wanted to leave each other alone we drew a heart on our ceilings and thought if we look at it the other will feel it somehow. I smiled softly noticed how shaky the heart looked like. I wasn't tall enough to reach the ceiling so I got on my tiptoes and drew that shaky heart. Luca laughed and me and made so many jokes about how little I was that it really got into my nerves. I chuckled and looked outside. The rain finally had stopped.
Sometimes I missed being with Luca, talking to him whenever I felt bad or just having him around him. His scent of peach and vanilla, that really smelt crazy but so good was sometimes still around me. I kept laying in bed looking outside as my eyes slowly closed and I finally felt asleep.

"One day we won't be here anymore but the heart will stay." Luca said with his gap in his teeth. "But what if the new owner sees the heart and draw over it?" I looked at ceiling, a little blue shaky heart on it that Luca made me draw. He said everytime I feel alone or sad and he isn't around I should look at the heart.
He also had drawn a heart on his ceiling but his heart was yellow and not as shaky as mine. I looked at him but he kept looking at the heart. "Luca, promise me one thing." I looked at him as his eyes slowly met mine. "Promise me no matter what we will always be together." I looked at him as he smiled "oh Lilith..." He chuckled "nothing can separate us." I looked at him and held my pinky out to him "pinky promise me." I said and looked at him as he started to laugh a bit. I sighed and stared a little angry at him but as he also hold out his pinky the anger flew away.
"I pinky promise you Lilith."