Sanscest Oneshots

"The Baby Fire" [Errorink]

Two powerful people stood in the middle of the clothing store. Two practically gods were grabbing and returning clothes left and right. Two idiots were stuck trying to find formal clothing with a specific color scheme. Error and Ink was on a shopping spree for clothes, specifically.

~Error's POV~

Something Yellow, Black, and White?What the fuck are those fucktards trying to make me wear? Cowhide with some piss for color?! Moreover- Why am I invested in finding clothes that match that weirdass code? What the fuck am I doing??? Why am I stressing myself out for one goddamn baby shower???

I stopped at my tracks, finding myself staring at a clown costume with the same exact color scheme Yellow Highlighter and Cow wanted for the baby fire- I mean shower. God! Ink splat's memory loss is starting to get to me.

"Why the fuck is ONE goddamn-" I shouted out loud from frustration but was cut off by ink shouting "Ruru! Glitchy! Error!!! I found my outfit!". I whipped my head at him and glared at him. But before I could yell at him to shut up, I stared at his outfit in disbelief and tried my hardest not to laugh, trying to keep a straight face.

He was wearing... A yellow T-shirt with a banana printed on it with black and white striped square pants...

"See? I'm so smart-" He tried to say but I cut him off saying "Shut it and find something else. They said "formal" not some hobo going back to highschool after failing 10 times.". He gasped and tried to fight back but paused before rushing to check his scarf.

"Fucking idiot..." I mutter under my breath and just stare at him who was still reading his scarf. "Oh." He said, finally realizing and basically took off the weird outfit before tossing it onto a clothing rack. "Eh, fuck that. Did you find anything?" He asked and I looked back at the clown costume before a smirk emerged from my face.

"Why don't you try this? It's perfect for you." I suggested, making sure my tone sounded just right so he would buy it. He tilted his head in confusion and I gave him the said clown costume before his question mark pinpricks turned into a red scribble. "You have bad taste." He said and I paused before replying "I don't, this costume is just screaming for you to wear it." Before laughing.

"Ha ha, very funny." Ink said sarcastically and I continued laughing at him.

"I'm leaving" he blurted out and I stop, actually a bit concerned. "Where are you going?" I asked and he stopped. "I don't know? What were we doing again?" He asked and My eyes almost popped out of my skull.

"Clothes, dingus..." I said, glaring at him like the stupid ass he is and what he said next made me wonder if he was gaslighting me or something.

"But I can just make clothes? Why are we even here?" He said, WAY too genuine to be true and I just stood there, disbelief and just irritation.

"YOU were the one suggesting we come here and saying something about helping the economy shit..." I said in a low tone, just shocked at the level of stupid and carelessness this guy had.

"Forget that! Let's make our own!" He suddenly yelled out and quickly rushed down the aisle, leaving me just confused.

God...Ink was such a stone head sometimes... Always forgetting, and then switching moods and... That ass- what.

"I'm back! And I brought those crocheting yarns and I brought some fabric! Cyan, green, and red like Drom and Chris said." He exclaimed holding the said materials and I just stood there shocked.

"Ink... 'Dream and Cross', not 'Drom and Chris'. It's also Yellow, Black, and White not Cyan, Green, and Red." I stated, not even questioning where he got those things even if we were in a clothing store, not a mall.

"Uhhhhh...."
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"You done?" I asked, chuckling at Ink's misery at trying to lock the stitch.

"It's so harrrd how do you do this everyday???" Ink whined and I took the sewing needle from him and taught him how to do it (again).

I couldn't help but feel a little proud of myself that he was praising my stitch locking arts and tightened the knot. "And that's how you do it, not whine to me all day." I said smugly and he took the scissors and cut the unnecessary string off.

"Okay so what time is it?" I asked and he grabbed his phone from his pocket.

"12:49"

"We're late."

"What."

I grabbed the suit and practically shoved him in it before quickly trying to wear mine. He opened a portal (finally being useful for once) and we both darted in—

~Ink's POV~

CRASH!

I fell on something hard and felt random sticky and soft things on my butt. I moved my hands to my face and saw brown stuff on them and I looked at everyone in the room.

Seeing all of them present, I greeted them happily before hearing Error crying...?

"INK WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?! THE CHOCOLATE CAKE!" He yelled and I turned to look at myself, confused on why he said that.

Oh- I'm sitting on the cake... I awkwardly got up from the table and tried keeping my lively expression but everyone was just staring blankly at me and there was a random baby crying.

Drom looked at me unsurprisingly and I turned to look at Error who was crying yet eating the remaining chocolate on the table I just landed on.

"Oops...?"

"Uhm...welcome to the baby shower...?" Chris greeted me and I just stood there.

"Is my butt covered in cake?" I asked and everyone continued being silent.

"I can't differentiate your cake from the chocolate cake." Error said and I smile at him, "Thanks.".

~3rd POV~

Everyone just stood at the two in disbelief. They had no regard for the actual event and we're just crashing the party but Dream just brushed it off, knowing that this would happen.

"Hey doo-doo skulls, this is a pucking baby shower. Stop trying to steal the damn lime light." Fell shouted and Ink turned to him confused.

"This is a what?-"

"And you!" Fell added, looking at Error who was eating all the dessert.

"Use a goddamn napkin for crying out loud or save something for the damn parents..." He lectured but Error didn't budge and just continued to eat while lounging around the couch.

"Fell, just....leave them alone.." Dream said and Fell sighed before trying to argue, "But look at them! They—"

"Error, I'm bored. When is the "fire" part gonna start in this baby fire?" Ink asked, now wearing a pink t shirt paired with pink pants and pink shoes. Error shrugged and continued doing his thing while Cross just stared at them, not even bothered anymore.

"Why did we even invite them?"
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The End—