Pursuing from the Shore (Sun Rays #2)

Chapter 10

Entry: Redler's Archive.

I can't deny it—he's getting more and more handsome in my eyes. That siren-eyed guy again.

Not that I'll say it out loud. Not that anyone will notice.

And I can't help but notice the way he moves, the way he laughs, the way he looks like he doesn't even realize how much of himself he leaves behind.

And in the margins of my thoughts, I let him stay.

Watching  him sketch kind of fascinates me—and to me, he's like already immortalized on paper. Not just the lines he draws, but the way he makes moments feel like they could last forever.

And somehow, without meaning to, I feel like I'm a part of it too—he drew me.

He admitted it.

Like graphite smudged on a page, he's everywhere I don't quite admit I want him to be.

That's enough for now. My archive entry's getting more and more longer—I hope my patience for that siren-eyed guy, too.

—aredgate

###

Chapter 10

His siren eyes... I don't even know how to describe them—they are like currents in the ocean that you know will drag you under if you stay too long.

And somehow, I still couldn't look away.

I wanted to say something... or anything. Ask him why. Ask him how. Because he admitted it—he'd been drawing me. All this time. Being drawn like that... being captured on paper without even realizing it... it's like being a secret someone treasures. A dangerous kind of feeling settled in my chest. And I didn't know if I wanted to resist it or just... let myself drown.

"O-Okay ka lang, Red?"

That stopped me dead in my tracks. I hadn't even realized I'd been staring at him for way too long. I quickly looked away and gave a small nod, pretending to clear my throat, all while trying but not to feel my face heating up.

He just complimented me... So why did it hit me so hard that I completely lost myself for a few seconds?

"I'm alright," I muttered softly, careful not to meet his eyes. "But... why did you draw me, anyway? And... what's this sketchpad for?" My voice trembled a little, even though I tried to act composed.

I noticed his Adam's apple bobbing slightly. "Dedicated... para sa 'yo," he said, like he was reading a label off his own notebook.

"Why?"

He hesitated, lips parting as if he was deciding whether to speak or stay silent. Then he said, "I... I like noticing things. 'Yong mga galaw mo, 'yong mga konting weird na expression mo tuwing frustrated ka, o ano mang mga bagay na hindi nakikita ng iba."

My hear beats faster and louder than before.

"At... minsan gusto ko lang i-save sa papel," may pagbibiro sa tono niya. "Para hindi mawala sa isip ko."

That confused me. He's trying to say something... I can feel it. But why is he so hesitant? Mas gugustuhin ko na lang yata na inisin niya o sirain ang araw ko... kaysa ganito, na parang awkward na awkward kami sa isa't isa.

I never want to assume.

He's been hanging around me lately because... well, we're friends, right? Hindi niya lang kasi nililinaw sa 'kin.

Like Edorina said, I've been slowly getting more surrounded by people. And honestly, I'm happy, despite my not-so-social personality, that my bandmates actually treat me genuinely. Then there's Edo, my best friend, and now Asther, who just kinda appeared out of nowhere. But with this dummy right in front of me... I honestly couldn't say we were friends.