STRINGS // KATSUKI BAKUGO [2]

Chapter 23 // Forget

You didn't tell anyone about your interaction with Emerson, not Eri when she came out of the dressing room, not Aizawa when you met up with him and Yamada in the food court, not anyone.

You kept it to yourself amongst the other secret you were hiding from those around you.

You didn't feel good about it. You hated it, but no one else deserved to get roped into your problems. You'd just have to suffer in silence. You've done it before. You'd do it again.

You kept your demons to yourself as you, Eri, Aizawa, and Yamada enjoyed lunch together. You pretended the four of you were a perfect, happy, completely non-dysfunctional family. You wanted to enjoy the little things because, one day, they'd die with you.

You remained practically silent as the four of you finished up your shopping. You stayed quiet during the drive to take Yamada home. You didn't say a word as Aizawa headed back to his house.

Aizawa didn't say anything in relation to your silence until Eri had bolted up the stairs to her room to prepare for the party.

"Kid," he began as he set the bags in his hand on the couch before turning to face you, "you gotta talk to me."

You wordlessly set the bags in your hands on the coffee table before sitting on the only open coushin of the couch.

"You've been weird," Aizawa continued. "One moment, you seem content, happy. The next, you have this look on your face like someone's actively draining all of the energy from your body."

"Perfect description..." you muttered.

"That," he said, pointing a finger, "that is what I mean. You have these moments where you seem like you just...don't care."

You rested your elbows on your knees and dropped your face into your hands, digging the joints of your wrists into your eyes.

You heard the bags Aizawa had set on the couch rustle and crinkle as the man moved them in order to have room to sit beside you.

"You asked me last night if there was something I needed to talk about," you eventually stated as you lifted your head. "Do I need to? Yes. Do I want to? Not at all. What do I do?"

"I'm not one to force others to talk about things they don't want to," Aizawa began, "but it seems like you're completely aware that you have to talk about whatever it is that you've been keeping to yourself."

You pursed your lips, hesitating to admit the truth. You dug your fingernails into the palms of your hands as you gritted your teeth.

"I'm dying."

The atmosphere of the room immediately changed. It was quiet before, but it was haunting now. It was calm before, but it was tense now. It was comfortable before, it was melancholy now.

"A tumor appeared in my brain due to radiation exposure from the brainwashing," you explained, your voice shaky. "It ruptured after I took a blow to the head in America. Now I'm experiencing cognitive brain dysfunction as a result. I'm starting to—"

"—forget things," Aizawa finished.

"That's why I was so upset when I couldn't found the bathroom," you said, "because that's just the start. Soon, I'm gonna start forgetting the people around me. I'm gonna forget my parents. I'm gonna forget U.A and my classmates. I'm gonna forget Shinso. I'm gonna forget Bakugo. I'm gonna forget you."

"Why did you keep this to yourself?" Aizawa wondered.

"Because I thought I could handle it on my own," you admitted, "but I can't. I can't even remember where the stupid bathroom is."

You cupped a hand over your eyes just as Aizawa place his hand on your shoulder, and the contact caused the invisible barrier holding back your tears to break.

"I'm sorry," you apologized, blinking at the itchy sensation that gathered in your eyes at the feeling of your tears slamming against the palm of your hand before ricocheting back into your eyes.

Aizawa's arm curled around your shoulder, and you felt yourself being tucked into his side before his other hand came up to cup the back of your head.

"The doctor said that, if I take another hit to the head, there's a heavy possibility I could die immediately," you explained through choked sobs and a river of tears, "but I can't just give up now. I have to find my mom and Bakugo. After that, I'll be done, even if being done means being dead."

Aizawa's hold on you tightened at your final statement, but he didn't say anything. He simply continued to hug you, silently comforting you.

"What's going on?"

Your eyes fluttered open at the sound of Eri's innocent yet worried voice, but you remained unmoving in Aizawa's arms.

"Eri, go back upstairs please," Aizawa stated, trying to sound calm, but the faint, underlying shakiness to his tone told you he was just as distraught as you were.

"Is [L/N] crying?" Eri asked, her small feet barely making any noise against the floor as she slowly approached the two of you. "Mr. Deku says people cry when they're sad."

You wriggled your way out of Aizawa's arms with a gulp that burned your throat, and you dried your cheek as best you could with the back of your hand before looking down at Eri.

Her crimson red eyes stared at you with anxiety and concern, and you almost shed another wave of tears at the thought that one day you wouldn't recognize these eyes.

"I'm fine, Eri," you assured, swallowing the sob crawling up your throat. "I just had a moment."

"But you're okay now?" Eri wondered, her head tilting ever so slightly in question.

"I'm okay," you promised. It was a lie, but she didn't need to know that.

Eri didn't respond verbally, but she instead lifted her arms up and flexed her fingers at you.

You scooped the child off the floor and set in her in your lap where she was quick to wrap her arms around your torso and lay her head on your chest.

You circled your arms around the girl's body and clutched her against you, desperately savoring the hug.

You tired to ignore the fact that someday you'd forget this sweet, innocent little girl, your baby sister.

[EDITED]