Bottom Harry One Shots

Stop The World (i wanna get off with u)

Summary: Harry sighs. He's happy for his friends, most certainly, but he can't help but be a bit frustrated at the fact that it seems like everyone is hooking up these days. He thinks to himself that maybe it's just because his current crush is a guy that it's so difficult to make any sort of move, but then he remembers that.

Ship: HarryPotterxDracoMalfoy

All credit goes to Transharry (fortyfiveangrycats) on Ao3

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Walking to the Great Hall for supper, Harry fiddles with the hem of his shirt. Hermione and Ron are a few paces in front of him, hand-in-hand, and Harry's heard the story Ron's telling about four times already today (once to Harry himself, then to Seamus and Dean, Fred and George, and Ginny, who all asked him "Ron, is that a hickey?"). Of course, it was very blatantly obvious by Ron's toothy grin and messy hair that yes , it was a hickey, and even more importantly— this was a hickey given by none other than Hermione.

Harry sighs. He's happy for his friends, most certainly, but he can't help but be a bit frustrated at the fact that it seems like everyone is hooking up these days. He thinks to himself that maybe it's just because his current crush is a guy that it's so difficult to make any sort of move, but then he remembers that:

Upon Ron sharing his "oh yeah I got a hickey from Hermione" story to Seamus and Dean, of course Seamus had to flash his very own, stating that "yeah, Dean's pretty good at giving hickeys, probably from all that practice on your sister," which of course, led Ron to smack him upside the head with a pillow from the common room couch. Harry fancied none other than Draco Malfoy. The douchiest of douches. Yet for some agonizing reason, there's always some sort of unresolved tension between Draco and himself. And not in the fighting way— for example, how after finishing a snarky comment directed towards Harry, Draco would bite his lip in that goddamn way he does. Fuck him (in Harry's mind, hopefully that will be in the literal sense soon enough).

"Harry? You alright?" Ron asks, peering back at Harry, most obviously lost in thought. Hermione cranes her head around to glance at Harry as well, her curly hair bouncing against her shoulders.

"'M fine," Harry responds, "just thinking." Yeah, about Draco Malfoy, that fucker .

He looks at Ron as they sit down at the Gryffindor table, and blatantly asks, "why am I suddenly horny?" in which Ron looks at him like he's lost and Hermione just shakes her head.

"Harry, it's called hormones," Hermione says matter-of-factly. "There are things you can do about your current situation, you know."

Harry finds himself sighing again. "Okay, I can't just have sex right here and now, though."

Ron puts his hands out to his sides as if to say "well of course not, you idiot," and Harry unenthusiastically nods in response. Of course Jerking Off Is Great And All but it's not going to help this time around. Shit.

Shit.

Draco, sitting at his own table for supper, holds a book in one hand and his spoon in the other, taking bites of mashed potatoes as he turns pages. He glances quickly at the Gryffindor table, more specifically, he glances right at Harry, his lips curving into the slightest smirk. Harry's mind immediately races with his natural Malfoy Translating Radar™ that is programmed into him, wondering if the smirk meant "hah, Potter, everyone knows you're horny now," or if it meant "yeah, you can have sex right here and now with me ," which begins to drive him crazy.

For five minutes, Harry stares down at his plate, before ultimately declaring, "fuck it, I'll be back soon," and leaving a puzzled Ron and concerned Hermione as he walked towards the Slytherin table. He can hear Ron mutter "oh, God," as Harry nears Draco, and considering that his very best friends knew not of his massive crush on the blithering idiot, they had every right to be worried for the outcome of this encounter— in fact, Harry himself was terrified of how this would go.