Cure {A.I}

left

I woke up to Aggie sitting at the end of my bed on her phone.

"Ugh..." I groaned.

"Oh good morning love." she said turning her phone off.

"Here." she handed me a bucket and I threw up right into it.

The sore taste was enough to make me pass out. I blinked the black spots out of my eyes and spit the remaining vomit in the bucket. I took the bottle of water Aggie handed me and took the bucket. After she came back from the bathroo, she payed down in the bed next to me and hugged me.

"Hey it's ok." she said snuggling me.

"Fuck...." I said remembering.

"Hey don't think about it." She said. "On the bright side, you have a hangover to get over. ok that's not a bright side but there is a bright side to something."

"Fuuuucccckkkk!" I groaned.

"Alright. Listen up. How do you know he cheated on you. Ashton wouldn't cheat on you." she sat up.

"No Ashton doesn't cheat on ppl. it was Sarah. Sarah is..."

She interrupted me.

"I know who Sarah is. Calum told me everything."

I lifted my head failed and let it fall back on the pillow. the throbbing in my head was almost unbearable. my stomach felt sick and my whole body was groggy.

"Just go back to sleep. Love you and don't think about Ash." She pulled the covers over my shoulders and left the room.

Instantly I fell back asleep.

•••

After throwing up and trying to get every last bit of alcohol out of my system, I texted to Calum.

Is Ashton home?

Calum - Yeah

Well is he gonna leave?

Calum - Yeah.

Ok. I'm coming over.

Calum - Yeah... ok.

Oh shut up.

Calum - As long as your not still hung over.

Finally you say something other that "yeah." I'll see you in an hour.

Calum - Yeah

Stfu

Calum - Yeah

I locked my phone after growling at Calum's "yeah's" .

I jumped in the shower. All I could think about was Ashton. I wanted to cry so bad but I couldn't. Not yet. Not in the shower. I had to wait. I had to be strong for just a little bit longer. If Ashton knew I was being weak, what would he think. He was the one who cheated. I should be angry. But I was just depressed. I was so fucking depressed. I didn't know if I was cry bc the shower water was running down my face. I didn't want to know if I was crying. I felt like i was crying but I always felt like I was crying.

I got out of the shower and dressed into black jeans and a sweat shirt and black converse.

I got in my car and and drove to Calum's house.

•••

"Ugh I'm so sorry!" I said to Calum giving him a hug.

"Hey no! Is ok." he hugged me back. "Come on in."

"Thanks." I walked inside and he guided me to his room.

His gray walls were covered with his Bass guitars hanging from hooks. A single unmade twin bed was pushed to a corner and the rest of the room was spot less.

"Why so clean?" I asked, making my way to his bed and sitting down.

"No need to. I usually keep everything in the closet. I don't have that many things. Mostly living on the road and all." he said.

I nodded. "so your going back to Australia I assume."

"I guess. I don't really know. this whole thing wasn't meant to happen. And I'm sorry that it has to end like this."

"Hey. I don't want anyone being sorry."

"No. I'm sorry for myself. I like it here. I like you and Chicago and the air. There is something about this place that makes me feel at home." he looked away in silence.

I took a deep breath trying to break the silence.

"I love it here." he said finally. "I love you. I love seeing Ashton love you. he has never been this happy with a girl. Ever. your the reason for all of this. I don't think you realize how much you mean to this band."

I blinked in shock. "did you talk to Ashton?"

"Umm..." he looked at me with sadness in his eyes.

"What did he say." I whispered. I was afraid. Afraid he didn't love me anymore. Afraid of losing my ground.

"I didn't end up talking to him. I was too angry. I'm sorry."

"No. it's ok." I tried to laugh but failed.

"Yeah... I'm sorry..."

"No! It's fine!" I have him a fake smile and looked away.

Well I have to go." Calum said.
"Some like conference thing or whatever."

"K." I grabbeb my purse.

"Again, I'm sorry. Really."

"No. It's fine. I'm fine." I scratched my eyebrow.

"Ok..."

I turned around and left the room. I went out to my car and sat down, driving away.

I needed to get away. Everything about this town reminded me of Ashton. Right now I don't need that. It was too heartaching. I just needed to go away for a little while. So I just went home and packed my backs, got my savings out of the bank and left. I flew to London. I didn't know anyone there. Nothing was familiar. I was safe. I got a hotel room for a month. I spent every morning in a new coffee shop in the city. A new beverage every morning. I would go out and site see then stop at a sandwich shop for lunch, site see some more, then go out to pub after dinner. I didn't drink. Beer reminded me of Ashton and wine reminded me of Calum. And the laughter reminded me of Michael. And the lovers in the corner reminded me of the way we were. They why we didn't care that we were in public. We just lived. Appreciating every small movement. Loving Ashton was the most beautiful thing in the entire world of Gore. It taught me to live like I wouldn't live again because I wouldn't. I would die someday but it's up to me to make it worth it. It was all gone now. Spending your time with the person you love doesn't last forever. It's the love that will always haunts your sleep. Creep upon you till you can't breath. I couldn't have Ashton forever. I couldn't kiss him forever. I couldn't hear his laugh forever. Happiness is temporary. But love is eternal. Some things I wish things weren't as they apeared.