𝐴 𝑇ℎ𝑟𝑜𝑤 𝐴𝑡 𝐿𝑜𝑣𝑒 𝐴𝑔𝑎𝑖𝑛

𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑝𝑡𝑒𝑟 𝑡𝑤𝑒𝑛𝑡𝑦 𝑜𝑛𝑒

'With trust, every silence is understood'
~anonymous.

Rahma breathed deeply, willing herself to remain calm. It was fine, everything was,—except her, but it didn't matter as minutes from now they will receive news of her and Dawud's new bond.

Surely, as she sat there on her bed all dressed up, barely listening to her sisters and cousins ramble around her, her phone pinged in her lap and she took a minute to calm herself before looking at it and while the minute passed her phone pinged again and she finally turned the screen face up and stared at the two messages that stood out among others on the screen.

She entered the app and contemplated which message to read first, the one from ya sudais or from an unknown number who seemed to have messaged first. Her shaky finger hovered above the unknown number and because she strongly believed it was Ali, she decided not to further spoil her mood and read ya sudais', even though it wouldn't exactly make her any better.

'congratulations Rahma. The knot has been tied, I wish you all the happiness in this world'.

She released a shaky breath and tuned out the screams and ululations in the background and tapped on the other message.

'you made a mistake Rahma, I warned you. You are mine'.

A lone tear slid down her cheek as ya hameeda wrapped her arms around her, she locked the screen of her phone and let her sister comfort her.

Everything became noisy and her mind was hazy but she plastered a smile on her face to avoid any questions. Everyone was happy, proud of her and in the mood of celebration. She heard whatever was being said around her but couldn't make out what she heard, couldn't reply but smile.

While she let her mind wander around, the men returned from the mosque and as she had insisted on not being made up, hameeda applied lipgloss on her lips and helped her downstairs. Rahma heard the loud voices everywhere and since her sight was partly restricted, she couldn't see anything except to follow her sisters' lead.

Soon enough, they stopped walking and from underneath the veil, she saw a pair of man shoes in front of her and Dawud's familiar scent that usually suffocated her, hit her senses. She still felt her sisters' hand on her arm, hameeda still guided her, though Dawud walked beside her.

They entered another room and the familiar rug that lay on the floor of her father's living room welcomed her and a few steps later, she was squatting with Dawud and then her fathers' and uncle's voices hit her ears, she listened to every praise, prayer and advice. She wanted desperately to be alone but she knew it was impossible.

Minutes that felt like hours later, they stood up and walked to her mothers and aunties. They were louder and more talkative, but she endured and counted numbers in her head until they stood up and when she thought it was over, someone said it was time for pictures, so they went to the sitting room upstairs where she was seated on a couch and she felt her sister's presence leave her side and a minute later, she saw neat manly fingers holding the hem of the veil and she held her breathe only releasing it when her face was exposed to hundreds pairs of eyes.

More ululations and teases.

She plastered the smile again and looked up for the photographer to click away. She avoided Dawud's gaze and even though they were sitting very close— closer than they had ever been, she refused herself to look at him. They weren't touching physically as they were both layered in clothes, but she still felt affected by their closeness.

"You two are married now, can you please look like it". Rahma's gaze rose to glare at halima but the girl was saying something to the photographer.