An Ode to Muses to Polyhymnia

Sleeping Reality

I don't like the bright lights,

Waking up feels like a chore,

And drug-induced sleep can cure any illness.

I don't want dreams,

Any illusion of my life really.

Turning the wheel in the wrong direction gets tempting every day.

I'm tired of screaming,

Just let me sleep,

Just please let me sleep.

I can only stay here, confined to 4 walls.

All I want is silence.

Shh, be quiet.

I can't handle words, ideas, or any more bad news.

Please, be quiet.

Every sound spins the wheel further,

I don't need to smile or laugh,

Just tuck me in and sing me to sleep.

I'm always cold, so crying keeps me warm.

Can I please sleep?

Staying awake drowns me with porcelain shards.

I can't do this anymore.

I don't want to slam doors, the bad words, or sobbing on the bathroom floor.

I can't even be myself or tell the truth,

I settle for the acceptable version.

I want to go home,

Where smells are familiar,

And everything is in a language I understand.

The things that haunted me suddenly embrace me,

I want to be taken care of.

I feel like my limbs are stretched out,

My voice starts to croak,

And everything sounds like nails on a chalkboard.

I want silence, sleep, and darkness.

Why did I have to wake up to the light?

Why can't you ever sleep without sound?

Please stop!

I want that familiar silence,

The one that echos in my dreams.

Please, be quiet.

Let me be at peace and finally rest.

I never get a break from bright lights and loud noises.

Can someone finally take care of me?

I'm so tired,

Can I have one day that is mine?

I just want to sleep, forever.