lost cause | billie eilish

32 | no doubt

yeah, it's true. billie found my family, contacted them, and got them to come to my competition. and i couldn't be happier.

being reunited with my family is something i used to only dream of, i never thought it'd happen.

i couldn't thank billie enough.

i was able to spend time with my family, and they also got to know billie which was really cool.

life is good.

well, besides the stress i have for the olympics.

with figure skating in the olympics, there are 4 categories with 6 competitors from each participating country.

the categories are: pairs (2 people), ice dance (2 people), men (1 person), and women (1 person) .

i was chosen to represent the united states in the women's division. so i will have a very complex solo, which is really really stressful to even think about.

i've been training and rehearsing a lot but it just never seems like enough.

-

"saylor," billie started as she watched me practice from the stands. "how bout you take a break baby, it's been hours."

"no," i breathed heavily. "olympics are in a month, i need to be ready. i just need to nail this routine."

"you've done the routine 1000 times now," she gave me a concerned look. "you're pushing yourself way too hard, you're clearly exhausted-"

i then landed a double axel, stumbling a little as i came down. frustrated, i groaned loud as fuck.

billie sighed. "moony-"

"no just let me try it again-"

"saylor!" she exclaimed sternly. "come here."

my eyes slightly went wide as she caught me off guard with that. i took a deep breath and skated over to her.

billie reached out and held my hands.

"you're amazing saylor," she started. "there's a reason you were chosen to do the women's single performance."

my face suddenly became sad. "i- i just don't wanna let anyone down."

"you're literally one of the best skaters in the world," billie assured me.

i just looked down at the floor.

"hey look at me," she lifted my chin up. "you've trained for this your whole life, trust in that."

"thanks b," i blushed. "i guess the pressure is just really overwhelming."

"then let's find a way to ease that pressure, yeah?" she suggested. "let's just take the rest of this night off and go home so you can relax. i'll literally give you a massage, im sure you could use one."

"wait can we get ice cream first?" i cheesed.

"yes," she giggled. "we can get ice cream."

i smiled, a bit of the tension easing from my shoulders. i took off my skates, went to grab my duffel, and billie and i walked out the building hand in hand.

-

"welcome to cold stone!" the girl said.

billie and i walked up to the counter and started looking at the different ice cream flavors.

"what can i get yo- oh my god"

billie laughed. "hi."

"yo- you're billie!" the girl's eyes remained wide.