Taylor and Victor

Chapter 6

Victor

Un-occasionally, his mind always wanders around her when he isn't intended to.

He didn't have any significant impact on her. Taylor looked like everyone else, with her choices of clothes undistinguishable. Her present goes unnoticeable. Perhaps was because of how he observed her more often with his fresh pair of eyes. Victor would be lying if said he had interest.

"And maybe I'll have to stay back at the campus in the winter," Alan said, and he's wiggling the spoon in his hand, pointing randomly while talking. "I've never known it's a thing."

He wouldn't want to make his busy life busier, though.

"Now you do. Does that mean Vic would be staying home alone?" his mother asked. "Do you want to come over grandpa's house with us?"

"He gotta," his father said. "They're your family. You won't be doing anything here, why would you stay?"

"I'll be staying," Victor said.

"What's there here? Did you plan to reconstruct our house or something? Just go with mom and dad," Alan said.

"Maybe," he mumbled.

After a while, Victor stands up and puts his empty plate in the sink. He leaves his family's chatting behind and walks upstairs.

His grandparent's house's big, wide, beautiful, idyllic. And always stuffed with animals and crops needed to be taken care of. But that's not the point. He got something else to resolve.

Besides their school, only Sam's house's right for them to meet as a coincidence. He spent most of his weekend over, as he couldn't be quite sure when she'll be there. Sometimes they met, sometimes he missed. Other times, there's only them staying together. For minutes. He couldn't find himself questioning her much, but she found her present comfortable.

Taylor's always reading book in her corner, if not, he never seen her around. Time when he's playing with Sam, Victor carefully shifts his attention to the book corner. She would be there, always. He legs folded and her hand quietly flipping pages. Her attention never make its way to him. His existence is what she never noticed. And everytime, he got to stare at her without her knowing.

He likes her straight hair, if to ever ask. The shiny straight hair which falls down to her chest. Victor imagines his hand brushing against. Along with her deep dark eyes, always looked too comfortable.

But Taylot usually has her head tilting down. Her only displayed movement he can see is her hand, running along the lines and flipping book pages. Victor wishes she could be sitting closer, so he didn't have such a hard time peeking over.

"Dude, where are you looking at? We're losing," Sam shouted out just before Victor turned back.

Sometimes he hopes Sam has some other things to do, so he could be alone with Taylor. Even for minutes.

Victor makes it obvious that he had something needing to ask her when Sam did. With his body facing hers and a better chance of catching her gaze. Taylor still makes herself as comfortable as she could. If she doesn't reply, Victor got no other way to know she has been noticed.

"Where are you from?" he asked her one day about Sam's upstairs helping his mother pack some food. Taylor keeps her face cool, her eyes reading as if he wasn't there.

"Nowhere."

"Do you have a sister?" he asked another time when she was just walking down from the stairs.

"No."

Victor never feels justified because she never truly admits something. All the answers he received were vague and random. She never takes her time to make up an answer, nor to look up at him. Taylor did make up sentences, but he couldn't tell if it made any difference.

"Did you have a crush on Mia?"

"No, what were you thinking?" Her eyebrows moved, lightly. He wouldn't notice if he blinked.

"You stare at her all the time."

"I zoned out, you're mistaken."

He figured out she's lying without leaving evidence. Because no one would have a specific place of where to zone out. When he catches her eyes in the hallway, Taylor's staring at Mia. Her hands are playing with her shoulder straps. Victor imagines what she would like if he came closer and waved his hand in front of her face. Though he did nothing. And he doesn't want to make himself look like a stalker.

Victor turns back to continue talking with Justin, before both of them have to come back to their class.

Taylor

She could see the way people's treating Mia from her locker, even from afar. She could point out another reason why she was more loveable to others.

Kind.

Taylor isn't so bad, not to herself. She would know how to treat people the right way how they wanted to be. But the idea of keeping following around them to treat them right is rather exhausting. Her understanding about the situation is enough, she won't try to ever make things better.

And with other reasons, by she means is him. Him who always grabs Sam's attention and makes them sit together. Him who doesn't leave her basement alone.

And thanks to him, she doesn't get the luxury of enjoying her lunch break anymore.

There's one thing she has come to like lately. It's not how people treated her but how she started to get less uncomfortable around. She talked to Mia more often, at least more than before. Sometimes she's funny, but some other time, Taylor wondered what Mia has been doing by herself.

"Did you finish Little Prince?" she asked Mia, once when they're in the canteen.

"I did."

"The part where the prince fell in love with his rose. It's awesome."

"Probably."

Mia never showed her interest everytime she talked about the book beside her. But Taylor still continues.

"What was your best part?"

"I don't know," Mia said. "All the same?"

Taylor's smile's still there. She could guess from Mia's enthusiasm and soon realised she would end up staring out at the window.

She tears her sandwich in portions with her utensils, boringly eating some fries with her fork. Taylor ignored all of them to stare out the window rather than trying to talk about anything. From inside her head, sounds of fork clicking and scratching faded, replaced by rustling sounds she imagined.

Everytime she woke up, a little hope from her inside thought her day would get better over time. Something she made up to keep herself existing. But as she observes her life display, Taylor gains doubt on the world.

She thought of the afterlife, not so often. Just a vague thought passed through her mind, ambiguous between life and death. When she does, she wonders if a fairy tale, or nothingless she would find.