P.S. Because I Loved You.

P.S. Because I Loved You [16].

September 6:

Dear Ethan,

"Tristan.." I whispered, "What are you doing here?"

"Rose, what is going on?" He breathes heavily, each exhale synchronized but covered in fear. "I turn on the television and the media says that you are arrested for murder. What the hell?"

"I was going to tell you-"

"When? Because apparently you don't trust me and I had to wait for the damn television to tell me about your life. Is this stuff even true?" His voice inflames, and his tone began to burn.

"Listen, you don't understand-" My  voice flusters and is swallowed in shame.

"I don't understand? Hell yeah, I don't understand if you don't tell me anything. Rose, we were both committed to build a relationship on the foundations of trust and love. You abused your trust privilege. Why do I even bother telling you my deepest secrets - my private thoughts - when you don't dare to tell me about your past?" His volume accelerated.

"No, Tristan, I do trust you. I just didn't know when it was the right time to tell you. I was afraid of you leaving me..."

"I would never leave you. And you know that. Tell me what happened, start from the very beginning and don't miss a detail." He took a deep, long sigh and sulked.

"It's a rather long story...and you want me to tell you now? I mean can't we go someplace else? There are guards and monitor cameras here." I wish I could reach out and hold his hand. The transparant wall separates us like he's in the sky and I'm on water.

"We can't go anywhere else," he scowled, "this is prison....prison." He looked down as if he was lost in his own mind. "Prison." He questions the statement.

I pursed my lips, anxious and unwilling. Where do I start?

"Well...? Are you even going to tell me the whole truth?" He grimaced.

I lowered my gaze, deliberating on how I should reveal the truth. Is there even any truth to this mess? The lies, the hatred, the regrets... all pour down on me.

He shoved the chair and pushed himself up, determined to walk away.

"No, Tristan! Don't go!"

"The hell with you and your secrets Rosalie!" He yelled.

His words wounded me. "You have no idea what I'm going through right now, Tristan. The worst I need you to do is walk out. Don't leave me when I have no one. Don't."

"I'm not leaving you. I'm taking a break from all this shit."

Tears commenced and swelled in my eyes; my throat felt muffled.

"Here's one question for you," his voice hardened, "if nobody found out about this and if you never were put in prison, would you still have bothered to tell me what happened?"

"Of cour-"

He stared me down. "Be honest." He enunciated.

"No. I wouldn't have." I sobbed.

"Thank you for at least that. Goodbye Rosalie." He stomped off and pushed past the guard.

Rosalie