Beyond This Existence

CHAPTER EIGHT

Chapter 8.

“DIOS KO ENA, baliw ata ‘to.” Komento ng kaibigan niya.

Hindi niya alam ang gagawin. Why is she crying? Gusto niyang magalit dahil sa sinaktan siya nito pero naaawa siya sa kalagayan nito ngayon. Bugso ng damdamhin kaya ba ko sinaktan? Pero bakit ako pa? Nakatungo ito at gumagalaw ang balikat sa sobrang pag-iyak. Nakakaawa kung tignan. Is it… connected to Kaelanna?

Umangat na ang tingin sa kanila ni Paris and they can now see how messed up she is. Her make up is ruined and her face is so red due to her crying. “I-I’m sorry.” She said, looking at Alenna. She could barely speak, she is shaking. “I-I’m sorry, I d-didn’t mean to–! I’m sorry!” Then, she started to cry on her shoulders again. They have no idea on what to do. She looked at her friend–who is now in his calm state; they are both just staring at Paris’ pathetic look.

“P-please don’t–don’t steal her from me...” She was bawling her eyes out. “I love her. Please u-understand…” she was pleadimg her. Paris doesn’t need to be specific because Alenna knows who she’s talking about. Nanlalamig siya, at hindi niya alam kung bakit. She is nervous about something that’s for sure. Maybe, nervous to find out that her ex is still into her.

This Paris is so much different from the Paris she met. This is different from the entitled brat that she thinks she is. This is different from that Paris... this is one is just broken and miserable. This is someone who is suffering. Alenna wants to stand up and give her a hug, but only if she could.

After a long hour of just crying, Paris then wiped her tears and stared at nowhere. She feels empty. She feels nothing. She looked up at them and mouthed, “Sorry.” With no voice at all. Alenna took the apology by simply smiling at her.

They were interrupted when Gian received a phone call. It was his mom. Gian looked at her, and Alenna told her to go and answer the phone. “I’ll be okay.” She assured her. I wasn’t sure of that to be honest. I feel like she’s going to attack me anytime soon. Gian then stood up and gave Paris death looks before leaving the room.

They were silence... and silence… and even more silence. Alenna was sitting on her bad and Paris was on the floor, sitting while her head rests on the wall. She was hoping for Paris to talk but I guess she lost her voice due to the extensive crying.

Humiga nalang siya ulit at tinitigan ang dingding ng kwarto niya. Hinayaan niya lang na andoon ang babae kasama sa kwarto niya. Maybe she needs to be alone, maybe she wants silence… so I’ll give her that. Pinagpahinga niya ang sarili sandali. Hindi naman siya matutulog, papalipasin lang ang oras.

“She broke up with me.”

Inayos ni Alenna ang pwesto niya at umupo siya sa higaan, saka niya sinabihan si Paris na umupo sa tabi niya. Tinanggihan naman ito ni Paris dahil kinuha nito ang mono-block sa loob ng kwarto at doon umupo.

“I’m sorry about pulling your hair like that... I was furious.” Pagsisimula nito. Hindi ito makatingin sa kaniya. “We were together for two months before she planned on moving to Germany. I thought she was going here for me but no… she said she was put here by some people. I know that before we started dating, she even mentioned that she was looking for something. I thought it’s a thing but later on she said it’s a place for her. Then you showed up in her life and now I know it’s a person.” A tear then fell onto her eye. “I r-really do love her. And I wanted it to work but it’s not p-possible.”

“She said she’s not the relationship type. She said we had fun, and that’s it. Every time we had sex, it feels like it’s just that. Fun. Pleasure and nothing else. It does feel like that to her but not to me…” A tear once again fell and she instantly wiped it using a handkerchief.