I didn't go to school for the next few days, it's now Tuesday of the next week. I've been having an internal crisis.
All week I've been eating only what I need to eat to make sure Jules and dad are satisfied with. But I feel like a failure, I've disappointed everyone.
I'm still not getting the grades I used to get disappointing dad and Leo and myself.
I'm eating too much disappointing myself.
I haven't danced in so long disappointing myself and my mom from the grave.
I haven't been singing disappointing myself and my mother from the grave.
I'm still not skinny enough disappointing myself and Thomas and Robert and Harley and Alex and James and Coco.
I haven't spent enough time with my sibling disappointing Leo, Gio, Val, Dom, Enzo, Mass, Rome, Gabby and Julie. Not Matteo though, I bet he wishes I was dead and honestly I do too.
Before I know it a tear has slipped from my eyes, I quickly wipe it away hoping no one noticed, but Marco did.
He gets up walking over to our Homeroom teacher Ms. Austin before walking out of the room dropping a piece of paper on his way by my desk.
I make sure no one is looking before picking it up, keeping an eye on my surroundings I open the paper.
'Meet me in the hallway by the smoking bathrooms
- Marco'
I wait a few minutes before asking Ms. Austin to go to the bathroom, she says yes of course and I walk down the hallways.
The smoking bathrooms don't have smoke detector or any of those devices that can tell if you're smoking or vaping.
It's where all the stoners hang out.
There on the other side of the school, when I get there I see Marco standing against the wall like the hot guy from an 80s movie. With one leg one the wall staring off into the distance.
I walk up and when he notices me he pushes himself off the wall and turns to me.
"You ok, you seem...... different." I blush at him noticing something."Yeah, I'm fine." My voice didn't even convince me, I sigh and shake my head no.
"No, I'm not." My voice cracks halfway, tears slowly falling down my face.He pulls me in a tight hug as soon as he saw a single tear, holding me close, I wrap my arms around him not wanting to let go.
I cry into his shoulder really glad I wore waterproof mascara today.
After what feels like forever I pull away, I look up at him into his eyes, his gorgeous chocolate eyes, I could get lost in.
I stand on my tippy toes, leaning forward till our lips touch. He guides me back till I hit the wall putting one arm on the wall next to my face the other around my waist tightly.
I wrap my arms around his neck interlocking my hands, he has to lean down a bit but we both don't want to stop.
Even for air.As we pull away we catch each others eyes, his arms still around me I hope they never leave.
"We should do this more often." His words send butterflies throw me.He walks off back to class and I just stand there stunned.
"Damn." I jump at the sudden noise I look over and see a girl with black hair and the most gorgeous green eyes ever."I want a guy to kiss me like that, you're lucky." We both watch as he turns the corner at the other end of the hall.
"I'm Nadia Albu, a sophomore." She holds her hand out to shake, we shake hands before going our separate ways. I head back to class so I don't get in trouble for being gone too long.
~~~~~~~
Throughout the whole day I found myself alone with Marco, kissing him too many times to count. Each time I didn't want it end, but now I'm in chemistry.
Everyone is engrossed in their various conversations that they don't even notice I've rested my head on Marco's shoulder, his arm around my shoulders and hand on my thigh.
"You feeling better?" Marco whispers in my ear well Ali rambles on about this show she's watching.
I look up at him, my chin on his shoulder, and smile.
"Yeah." I look in his eyes for a little longer before looking back at the group. I can still feel his eyes on me, making me smile.I think he likes me.
My heart flutters as he squeezes my leg slightly.
"Wow, what is this." Zoltan points at us with a play serious expression."Are you two dating?!" Ali squeals, smiling extra bright.
"No." I say it a little too fast, everyone seems to get a little tense and Marco tenses under me.
I start to feel uncomfortable, I try to play it off but with no luck.
I messed up didn't I?
~~~~~~~
Hours later I'm still replaying the moment in my mind as I lay in bed, my lights are off I'm all cozied up but I can't fall asleep.
As if it was fate my phone starts to ring, the bright light of my phone illuminates the room.
Marco it reads.I pick up the phone answering it, we both stay quiet for a little before he speaks first.
"Did I do something wrong?" His voice seems to be slurring his words, almost like he's drunk.
"Am I not good enough for you?" His voice breaks my heart, I feel his pain, and I feel like a piece of shit for making him feel this way.
"No.... it's not you it's me. And not in the way people use just so someone doesn't feel bad but when they actually mean it and it's actually not you and it's really me. I'm not good enough." Tears prick my eyes and my voice cracks.
"You are good enough." His voice is strong, still slurred but he says it with so much force I have to believe him.
"You are good enough." I say it back in the say tone as he did, to tell him the same thing. And to show him I actually mean it.
We talk for hours just enjoying each other's company and taking in their opinions.
Marco and I shared our problems, but we didn't make each other's problems seem small, we helped, really helped.Before I know it, it's 6am and it's time to get up, we change the calling to a FaceTime and get ready together.
He stays in bed a while longer well I get ready, we picked out my outfit, plain black leggings, an off the shoulder grey crewneck, and my Ugg's with a slick back bun.
I chose his outfit based on mine, he's wearing black sweats, a grey hoodie and some brown sneakers.
We didn't hang up till I was basically walking out the door.
Honestly, it was the most amazing phone call I've ever had.
I couldn't stop smiling on the way to school, even though I was tired I just couldn't stop.~~~~~~~~~
Hey guys!!!!!
I'm sooooooo in love with Adri and Marco!!!!!
Anywho,
Toodles
Xoxo-
Gabby 💋💋
💋.
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Angeli
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