Lost in madness

Chapter 28

For days, the apartment felt like a mausoleum. Every night, I'd set the table for two, only to stare at Andrew's empty chair as I picked at my food. The silence in the room was deafening, broken only by the occasional clink of my fork against the plate.

I'd glance at my phone, willing it to light up with a message from him. But it remained stubbornly dark.

At work, I was a ghost of myself. My colleagues shot me concerned looks as I drifted through the days, my mind a thousand miles away. Every few minutes, I'd check my phone, hoping for some word from him. But there was nothing.

"Dabe? Earth to Dabe!"

I snapped back to reality, finding my coworker, Jen, looking at me with concern. "Sorry, what?"

Jen's brow furrowed. "I asked if you had those reports ready for the meeting. Are you okay? You've been really out of it lately."

I forced a smile, hoping it didn't look as brittle as it felt. "Yeah, just... family stuff. You know how it is."

She nodded sympathetically. "Well, if you need to talk..."

"Thanks," I said quickly, turning back to my computer. "I'll have those reports to you in an hour."

As soon as Jen walked away, I let out a shaky breath. Family stuff. If only she knew.

The weight I was carrying pressed down on me, making it hard to breathe.

On the fourth night, I couldn't take it anymore. I curled up on the couch and the dam finally broke, I sobbed until I had no tears left.

Eventually, exhaustion won out, and I drifted into a fitful sleep.

I'm not sure what woke me – a change in the air, perhaps, or some sixth sense. But as I blinked awake, I realized I wasn't alone anymore.

Andrew was there, lying next to me on the bed. He looked utterly worn out, with dark circles under his eyes and stubble shadowing his jaw. Even in sleep, his brow was furrowed, as if he couldn't escape his worries even in dreams.

My heart ached at the sight of him. I reached out, my hand hovering just above his cheek, afraid that if I touched him, he might disappear like a mirage.

But then his hand came up, catching mine. He brought it to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to my palm. His eyes fluttered open, and for a long moment, we just stared at each other.

"You're here," I whispered, my voice rough with sleep and emotion.

Andrew nodded, his eyes never leaving mine. "I'm here," he murmured.

Without another word, he reached out and pulled me close. I went willingly, burying my face in his chest as his arms wrapped around me. He smelled of hospital antiseptic and coffee, but underneath it all was the familiar scent that was uniquely Andrew.

"I'm sorry," he whispered into my hair. "I'm so sorry, Dabe."

I pulled back slightly, looking up at him. "Where have you been?"

Andrew sighed, his hand coming up to cup my cheek. "At the hospital. Sally... she's not doing very well. Not just physically, but emotionally. The doctors are worried about her mental state."

The guilt hit me anew. Here I was, worried about our relationship failing, while Sally was falling apart. "Is she going to be okay?" I asked, hating how my voice trembled.

"Yeah," Andrew said, his voice heavy with exhaustion and worry. "She keeps asking for you, actually. Says she needs to talk to you."

I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. "Me?" I whispered.

Andrew nodded. "You two have always been close. I think... I think she needs that connection right now."

I closed my eyes, fighting back tears. How could I face Sally, knowing what I'd done? But how could I not be there for her in her time of need? Before all that-

"Andrew," I began, my heart racing. "There's something I need to tell you-"

But before I could continue, Andrew's lips were on mine, soft and desperate. When he pulled back, his eyes were shining with unshed tears.

"I love you, Dabe," he said, his voice raw. "God help me, I love you so much. But I can't... I can't leave Sally alone right now. She needs me. Do you understand?"

The words I'd been about to say died in my throat.

"I understand," I whispered instead, even as my heart shattered.

Andrew pulled me closer, burying his face in my hair. "I'm so sorry," he murmured. "I'll make it up to you later, I promise."

I stroked his back, feeling his body. "I know," I said softly. "I know you will."

We lay there in silence for a long time, holding each other as the first light of dawn began to creep through the windows. I knew that soon, Andrew would have to leave for a while. I wasn't sure when I would see him again. He'd go back to Sally, to the life he'd built with her. And I'd be left here, alone in this secret and a broken heart.