The Secrets We Keep

The Twentieth Chapter

Hayden

"How'd it go?" Nathan asks as I step up beside him. He's in front of one of the horses and is gently threading his fingers through its mane of hair. 

"It went well," I tell him, stepping up on a low stool to peer into the horse's stable. "We're actually hanging out again tomorrow." 

I don't know what I'd expected to come out of visiting Amelia's room. I guess I thought I would find something there that would help me make sense of her passing but, in a way, I found something, or someone, better: A friend.

Nathan looks at me out of the corner of his eye. "So you made a new friend going through what you're going through. Is that enough for you to move on?"

Moving on is such a weird concept. I mean, do you ever really get over seeing what we did? Already, I can feel myself changing. Seeing a dead body shows you a side of life that for a while had always been theoretical to me. But I guess this isn't exactly the time to get into this.

"Yep. Lost a friend and made a new one all in one day," I say as I reach across the space to stroke the horse's soft nose. It snorts and shakes out its tail. 

"You didn't lose me, Hayden," Nathan says with a sigh. He drops his arms to lean on the stall door and turns his head to watch me. "And I'm sorry I reacted so badly. I just haven't been sleeping well and I took out all my frustration on you. Which wasn't fair."

"It's ok," I say and mirror his posture. We both stand like that with our arms crossed over the stall door. "I can be pretty annoying sometimes. You'll have to get used to it if you really do want to be my friend."

"I think I'll manage if you can put up with my mood swings."

"Ugh, I'll try," I say and flip my hair over my shoulder dramatically. "You men and your PMSing. It's too much."

He grins at me, "Come on, let's head back."

I dust off my hands but before I step down on my stool and head out of the dreary and dusty stables, I put a hand back on his arm to stop him from walking away. I feel his body tense underneath my touch. 

"What?" He asks, leaning his hip back against the horse's stable door.

"What do you want?" I ask, remembering our deal back by the lockers. 

"For what? Oh, right. Are you asking what I want in exchange for taking you..." he trails off and I nod. His eyes become wicked as I cock my head to the side, waiting. "I'll let you know when I want to cash it in."

"Oh, come on," I whine and his eyes get brighter. "Can't you at least tell me what it is so that I can prepare myself?" 

What if he wants me to serve him hand and foot or make me do something ridiculous? 

The light here in the stable is weak and it bathes his face in a watery pattern. Nathan doesn't answer immediately and his eyes become more unreadable as he loses his smirk. He steps closer, almost crowding my body but I can't bring myself to take a step back.

Nathan leans his head down and then gently raises my chin so that our gazes lock. My breath becomes shallow as his fingers ghost lower down on my neck, over my pulse point, and back again. His blue eyes bore into mine and for just a moment everything disappears as I focus on his lips. They curl into a half grin when he realizes I'm staring at them.

"You know what I want from you," he says lowly and that tone does something to my insides. It twists them all up in a way that I never thought could feel so good. But before I can even blink, he's dropping his hand and walking toward the stables splintering barn doors.