Behind the screen

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Kenma lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. The previous night with Yuki played over and over in his mind. It had been the best time he had had in a long time, filled with passion and intensity that left him wanting more. Even after Yuki had left, the memory of her touch lingered, a constant distraction.

He sighed, knowing he had to push those thoughts aside for now. He had a stream to prepare for, and his fans expected a show. Rolling out of bed, he moved to his computer setup, the familiar routine grounding him. But as he prepared for his 18+ stream, he found his mind drifting back to Yuki.

Sitting at his desk, he glanced at the clock. It was late, but his audience would be waiting. He donned his mask and adjusted the camera, the persona of his masked alter ego slipping into place. The dichotomy of his life, the public gamer and the private streamer, had always been a delicate balance.

As the stream began, Kenma greeted his audience with a forced smile, the comments flooding in almost immediately. He started the usual routine, responding to messages and engaging with the viewers. His hands moved with practiced ease, teasing and enticing his audience.

Yet, even as he performed, his mind was elsewhere. Flashes of Yuki's smile, the way her eyes had looked into his with such intensity, distracted him. He remembered the way she had moaned his name, how she had responded to his touch. It was intoxicating, and he found himself craving more.

"You're all so good to me," he murmured into the camera, his voice taking on the husky tone his fans loved. "But there's someone who keeps stealing my thoughts tonight..."

The chat exploded with curiosity, but Kenma didn't elaborate. Instead, he continued the show, his movements more deliberate, more intense. The memories of how he had gotten into this type of streaming came rushing back. It had started as a way to cope, a means to an end, but now it felt like a prison. Each stream was an escape, yet it also reminded him of the constraints he had placed on himself.

He finished the stream with a flourish, the usual praise and adoration pouring in from his fans. But as he signed off and removed the mask, the emptiness returned. The thrill of the performance was fleeting, a temporary high that left him feeling more isolated than ever.

Kenma leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes. The memory of Yuki was a constant companion, haunting him even as he tried to focus on other things. He wondered if she was thinking about him too, if she felt the same pull that he did.

He sighed, running a hand through his hair. This dual life was becoming harder to maintain, especially now that someone like Yuki had entered it. He needed to figure out what he wanted, how to reconcile the different parts of himself.

For now, he decided to take a break from the 18+ streaming. It was becoming more of a burden than a release. He needed to focus on what truly made him happy – gaming, and maybe, just maybe, exploring what he felt for Yuki.