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(For some of them I just chose random people to be the third wheel)
Pen: I truly go into housewife mode when I'm someone's soulmate- like, I'll make you pancakes and bacon every morning.
Crystal: This is a lie.
Crystal: I'm literally dating him. This is a lie.
Crystal: HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO COOK A PANCAKE, WHAT IS THIS.
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Pen: Cause you're pretty and you're smart, and you're ignoring me so you're obviously my type.
Crystal, who was distracted: I'm sorry- what were you saying?
Pen: Perfect.
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Crystal: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.
Pen: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.
Crystal: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns??
Pen: Is it working?
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Crystal: Crushes are the worst. Whenever I'm near mine, I start acting stupid.
Pen: You always act stupid.
Pen:
Pen: Wait...
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Crystal: I'm in love with you.
Pen: We called off the prank war last night at midnight, dork.
Crystal: I know.
Pen: Ah. Okay. Um. Cool. Neat. Very cool. Cool. Cool. Coolcoolcool-
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Pen: Is something burning?
Crystal, leaning seductively on the counter: Just my desire for you.
Pen: Crystal, the toaster is literally on fire.
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Crystal: If I say I love you, will you say it back?
Pen: Yes.
Crystal: I love you.
Pen: It back.
