Alpha Vaughan

Chapter 41

I felt a shocked breath leave me. Seeing the look of agony infiltrating his eyes, I said nothing, continuing to listen.

"I was just a young teenager when I found her, and was still reeling from the death of my parents. I was... broken; I'd never been able to come to terms with their deaths, and thought I never would. Until she came along. My mate. I'd thought... I'd thought she was going to be my world, bring me joy and happiness: for a while she did; until... she didn't."

He turned to face me, and the pain in his grey eyes was so potent I felt my heart clench. I reached out to him, and he let me brush a palm over his face, my hand coming to settle on his right cheek. He covered my hand with his, holding tight.

He swallowed, then said, "I had thought she was so happy with our bond. I'd given her anything she could possibly want for, but it wasn't enough. I wasn't enough. She'd wanted something darker... craved something more dangerous." He inhaled. "Then one by one our pack members started to die."

Chills slid down my spine, but I nodded at him encouragingly, caressing the side of his face. "And then what happened?" I asked gently.

He continued, "The then Alpha of the pack, my father's former beta, had sent for healers far and wide to come tend to the ones that had managed to survive. When they were all well enough to be interrogated, they'd been unable to supply answers, too scared for their lives... And--"

My hand stilled when a tear slid down his face. Sadness filled me. "Vaugh--"

"And t-then I'd found her. I remember it'd been about to rain then and...and the hunt had been called off. She'd probably not been expecting me--goddess," he cut himself off, covering his face with a hand. "I wish I had never come back. I'm such a coward." His shoulders heaved.

Feeling my eyes prickle with tears, I gathered him into my arms, hugging his head to my chest. "Shh. Shhh, you're not a coward."

His arms went around me, and he buried his face deep into my shoulder. He continued to speak, his baritone sounding muffled, "She was with another man. He'd been balls deep into her, f*cking her senseless even as she held a knife to his throat. Then she saw me standing by the door and she'd stopped, and then slashed the man's throat like he was some sort of puppet." A shiver racked my body. "I should have told the pack about this, I should have..."

Running my fingers through his hair, I pressed a kiss to the side of his face, blinking back tears.

"But she was my mate," he continued. "Telling the whole pack about it would've meant her death. And she'd promised... She'd promised she'd never do it again, had sworn she didn't know what came over her. I'd wanted so badly to believe her, and I did."

A shudder worked its way through him. "A year later the killings started again, and I just... Knew. This time when I went home and saw her cutting up a pregnant she-wolf, I... I killed her. My own mate."

"Even then," he said. "I hadn't wanted her to suffer. Turning her in to the court would've earned her countless tortures. The elders thought by killing my mate I'd sacrificed the unthinkable for the pack's safety, but I hadn't." A sob escaped him and he clutched me tighter to him. "They'd covered it all up, saying she died of a rogue attack. But...but even knowing all she'd done, I didn't want her to suffer. I'd been so scared, Hilda. S-so scared and so foolish--"

A tear escaped me. "Don--"

"And now I'm scared allover again. I'm scared they'll take you away from me. I'm scared I'll take you away from me; I might do something, say something that'll make you leave agai--"

Gripping his wet face, I held held his gaze steadily, spelling out intently, "I'm not going anywhere, Vaughan. And no one, I repeat no one, will ever take me away from you. Not even you, not that you could. I'm here to stay, okay? Here to imagine you in a mermaid's tail and a tight pencil skirt--"

An incredulous smile cracked through his face and he asked, "Did you have to add that last part?"

A startled chuckle left me. "I know. Couldn't help it." I soon fell silent, continuing to hold his gaze. "What was her name?"

If he was taken aback by the question, he didn't show it. "Linda," he supplied lowly. "Her name was Linda."

"Well, Linda, had what was coming for her," I said, feeling hate for what she'd put Vaughan through bubble in me.

Now surprise slowly entered his gaze. "Hilda... Are you saying you don't despise me for killing my mate?"

Something in me clenched. "No, Vaughan. And I think anyone who does is as good a murderer as she was."

His gaze slid away from mine.

Absently I fingered the roots of his hair, my mind contemplating a question. To ask or not to ask? Holding my breath, I slowly pushed out, "Did you...do you still love her?"

Holding my gaze, an unreadable expression filled his eyes. "I don't think that's possible anymore."

A breath left me, and for a moment I frantically searched my mind for what to say. When he winced at the pain on his side, I jumped into action, rushing out, "You're hurting. Do you have a first aid kit lying around somewhere?"

He nodded. "It's in the room upstairs."

I turned and headed for the stairs with him following close behind. When we got in, I quickly spotted it on top a shelf. Vaughan went over and sat on the king sized bed.

Kit in hand, I turned and approached him. He watched me come, eyes focused on me intensely.

Sat there, with his large arms splayed out on the surface of the headboard, he looked every bit the alpha; a world away from the man that had cried on my shoulders.

Sitting on the spot before him, I opened the kit, taking out cotton wool. After hesitating a bit, I loosened the bandage, seeing his skin stitch back together right before my eyes.

"Hilda," he called above me softly.

Looking up, I met his gaze. He leaned in closer to me, holding my chin. "I know I said I wanted to know who hurt you, but if you're not ready to talk about it, then I will wait until you are."

Inhaling I closed my eyes shut. When I opened them again, I said quietly, "My father. He... he'd injected me with wolfsbane for four years." I looked down at my palms. "He'd wanted to trigger my dormant wolf to rise and protect me. She never did."

His jaw clenched immediately, eyes alternating between grey and bright yellow. "I swear... I swear I'm going to kill him. I'm g--"

"No," I said shaking my head, tears threatening to spill. "Don't. Please don't kill him."

He rose above me, fingers firm around my jaw. "Hilda, you cannot expect me to just let that go. You cannot want me to go on living knowing someone who hurt my f*cking mate is still alive and breathing."

I understood him, because I'd felt a similar loathing for Linda. But... he was still my father. "Please," I whispered out. "Do it for me."

"Hilda." His voice had never sounded that deep. "You ask for too much."

I continued to hold his gaze pleadingly, until he exhaled through his nose, going back to lean against the headboard, taking me along with him.

He positioned me before him, threading his hand through my hair to bring my face closer to his. Our foreheads almost touching, he asked lowly, "How can you be so forgiving?"

"I..." I couldn't think being this close to him. "He's still my father."

"Is that right?" he whispered, slowly running his thumb over the side of my face. "Someone who treats his children that way doesn't deserve to be called their father."

"I know..." I breathed out, our lips almost touching.

"I won't allow him anywhere near you."

"He wouldn't even want to be anywhere near me," I said absently.

"Good," he growled. Then he claimed my lips, turning us over.

Looking up at him from where he rose above me, I watched his canines grow longer, his eyes burn a deep yellow, and I thought; he was about to claim me.