Houston (ON HOLD)

Blake

The next "phase" is almost the exact same thing as the first one. They take me in almost every day, testing me and poking me with that stupid needle over and over again. I've gotten nearly permanent bruises on my arms from being poked so many times. My skin looks like a banana that's been beaten and battered to hell and back.

I'm constantly exhausted. The mental and physical pressure from the tests drains my energy, and I don't sleep often. If I'm lucky, I sleep a maximum of maybe two hours every few days. Most of the time I just stare at the wall, replaying whatever concoction of torture the scientists could come up with for me to endure. My body must not like being pumped with whatever they're giving me, so I throw up and get the shivers pretty often.

I lose count of the days. My sanity slowly slips away, the dark and the hunger driving me crazy. I get pieces of bread thrown through a slot in the door occasionally, but my stomach still aches constantly. I pace the room for most of the time, just worrying and losing my mind. There's stinging cuts on my knuckles, the price I paid for punching the wall. I don't sleep. I can doze off and on, but I've never really been able to get rest since I was thrown in here. I'm too paranoid about the nightmares and being attacked in my sleep to even think about closing my eyes for too long.

I've cried more times in here than I have in my entire life. I've held it together long enough in the camp, and now I can't hold it in anymore. Grief for my dead friends, worry for my family, an overwhelming sense of fear. They all plague me every minute that passes by in this sterile facility.

Occasionally I'll hear screams echoing down from the hall, something that haunts me whenever I lay down to rest for whatever time I have to myself.

One day I'm sitting on my bed, staring at the floor, when I happen look up and let out a scream, scrambling back on the stone to get away from what's in front of me.

My sister hangs from the ceiling, strung up by her neck with a rope. Her blank eyes stare at me as I look in horror at Emma hanging in front of me. Her long brown hair hangs around her face like a curtain. There is a gash across her stomach, spilling out her innards. Blood spills across the floor, puddling at my feet. Written on the wall, barely able to be seen, are the words YOUR FAULT written in blood.

I blink, and she disappears. I look around, my skin crawling with fear. My heart pounds in my ears and I struggle to breathe normally.

It was just an illusion. She wasn't real. She wasn't real. For all I know, Emma is alive and well back home. She isn't dead, hanged in front of me. It was all in my mind.

Still, I'm shaken. The image of her is imprinted on my eyelids. I see her hanging here every time I blink. My hands shake violently and I wipe my eyes, trying to think of something else.

Lacey's voice calls out. "You alright over there?"

"I thought...I saw something."

I hear her sigh. "Get used to them. I've had hallucinations since my third day. Try sleeping, they'll be less vivid."

I roll my eyes, though she can never see me do so. Yeah, right. Sleep has become something more of a wish now.

Somedays I wish I'd followed her advice. One day I see Alice sitting next to me, trying to get me to sing to her like she used to when she couldn't sleep. I'd ignored her until she finally went away. Another day I see my mother, reaching out for me. I give in to the pressure and step forward, only to have her disappear as I reach her. Some days are the same, Emma hanged, Alice begging me to sing, my mother's embrace too far away.

Every day seems identical to the last. There are no windows in the labs, so I have no clue what season it is anymore, or even how much time has passed. The only inkling of some information I got was when the male doctor had tried to make small talk with the female while they were preparing me for another experiment and he'd said, "Snow fell last night. That doesn't happen often does it?" That had told me it might be winter, but that seems like such a long time ago that I'd overheard that.