Cinder: In No Way, a Hero || Book 3

~ Chapter 16 - All For Nothing at All ~

hey there again.

another trigger warning

more violence, blood, and death, as well as self-harm and suicide

you've been warned

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Cinder watched as Ronin's form changed to IR. She then stared in shock as the HiveWing consumed Skyblaze's body, bone and all.

Cinder wanted to vomit.

"That is absolutely sick!" A guard shouted.

IR turned, drooling. He then lunged at the guard, devouring the SkyWing like it was nothing.

Cinder had to stop him.

She leapt at the HiveWing, stabbing him in the neck. She heard a cry of pain, but it wasn't IR.

It was Ronin.

IR laughed. "You fool. You seem to forget that your pathetic son feels the pain, too."

Cinder growled, wiping a tear. "You will NEVER hurt my son AGAIN!"

The HiveWing and SkyWing fought rapidly, neither seeming to be letting up.

IR finally got some damage on Cinder, plunging his tail into her shoulder. She growled, flying away.

"You coward!" IR shouted at he followed suit.

Eventually, they landed at the beach, and continued to fight.

Cinder finally got her hold on IR, who struggled in her grasp. His eyes flickered blue for a moment. "Please, Cin!"

Cinder grabbed her dagger, hesitating for a moment.

IR laughed. "You coward. You won't do it."

She sighed, wiping a tear, and gathering all of her strength.

"Goodbye, Ronin."

With that, she stabbed her dagger right into IR's chest, hitting his heart. IR gasped, watching as the blood poured out.

He couldn't even muster a word before his eyes faded to blue, and his form went limp. The HiveWing soon shrunk back to the RainWing Cinder remembered.

Cinder held back tears, looking at what she had done. She had killed her one source of happiness. Her one reason to keep going.

Her pride and joy.

Her best friend.

Her son.

Ronin.

After everything she had done, all her efforts to postpone or even eliminate the option, she still did it. She had wasted 2 years trying to save him; cure, after cure, after cure. Even so, the amount of blood she gave, the amount of sleep she lost, the amount of times both or either of their lives were at risk, were for nothing.

All of what she had done, for nothing.

All, for nothing at all.

She didn't know how to feel. Not about Ronin. She knew she hated herself. She was furious at herself. Why had the done the one thing she wasn't supposed to? Why had she broken her promise?

Why had she betrayed the only sliver of family she had?

She assumed it was her destiny; she would always betray her family. She had done so with Soot and her parents. Why should she surprised about betraying Ronin, Jacques, Angel, and Comet?

She guessed it was who she was.

It was fate that drew her to the bad decisions, that made her who she is. It was fate that said she would betray any family she would ever have.

She threw the dagger. "Curse the damned Moons!" she roared, tears streaming down her face.

She didn't care who heard her. Nothing mattered anymore now.

She had no more reason to live.

Comet would leave with Angel and Jacques. Maybe they could have a happy life.

But not Cinder. She would either rot in a cell or be killed the second someone found her.

And she would deserve it. She would deserve any punishment she got.

She took off her armor, laying it down gently by Ronin's body. She took off her skull helmet and threw it into the ocean. She did so with any skull jewelry she had. She ripped the skull earrings out of her ears. She didn't care that she was bleeding.

She deserved it.

She looked at her claws, which were as blood-red as her scales. She looked back at Ronin, hugging his deceased form.

"I'm so sorry, Ronin," she said as her voice broke.

She knew he couldn't hear him. His soul was long gone from his limp, pulseless body. She had still said it, so that maybe, wherever he was, he could hear it, and forgive her.

But she didn't deserve forgiveness. She knew that.

Cinder laid Ronin's body down gently. She took one of her horn rings, which was the color of obsidian. She took an arrow from her pouch, drilling it right into the spot where Soot had stabbed her. The wound began to bleed as it reopened. She kept the ring under the trickling blood until it was fully covered in her scarlet blood.

She set the ring down next to Ronin, as an homage to him. "Don't stress it," she said, chuckling to herself softly. "I don't need it. You can keep it."

With that, she set her pouches down, and sighed.

What was she to do now?

There was really only one option.

She took an arrow, not even cleaning the blood off of it. She slid it along her arms, getting dangerously close to her wrists.

She then snarled, stabbing the arrow into one of her wrists. She kept her tongue bit, to prevent screaming.

She grabbed another arrow and stabbed it through her other wrist.

She then sat, watching as the blood trickled down, waiting for her inevitable death.