Escapism.

1

ALORA

„Alora, bigger your jumps, they look unclean"

If I hear this sentence one more time.

The only way my jumps and turns will look clean is when I try to do them smoothly. But if I smoothing my turns and jumps, it's a problem too. Because apparently I look weak then.

I'm literally not in the right state of mind to keep up with her voice, so I try my best to just ignore it and do what I've been doing for a long time.

"ALORA STRETCH YOUR FOOT MORE ,GOSH HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO TELL YOU THAT"

She turns off the music.

"That's it for today, get out"
Without hesitation i pack my things to leave.

I put on my bag to walk to the door.

"If I see those horrible turns on the stage tomorrow i'll personally drag you off that stage in the middle of the performance" was all I heard before slamming the door shut.

I wasn't even really there, my head is somewhere else.
"Alora" I hear Sophia's voice. I turn around to see my best friends come up to me.
"Alora you okay ?, your eyes are completely red" Jenay asks me in complete horror.

"I'm okay, chill guys" they don't seem to believe me at all.
"What did you take ?"
"Nothing what do you mean ?"
"Alora you are not in the right state of mind"

Everything is shredded.

"Guys I'm okay chill,please go inside."
„You not going home like that" Sophia takes my bag and takes my hand before dragging me downstairs into her car.

I live like ten minutes by foot from the balletschool, but somehow thirty minutes with the car...and yet they insist on driving me.
They are three years older than me, yet treat me like they're child.

While driving, I'm looking outside of the window watching what is going on.

„lora you sure you didn't take anything ?" Jenay asks again. I take a deep breath before opening my mouth.
„For the last time...iam okay, I just didn't sleep"
„Sleep in like, I only had four hours of sleep, when I'm supposed to sleep ten hours, like the doctor told me too?" soph asks while driving.
Looking at her trough the drivers mirror it looks like she is mad.

„No sleep in like, i didn't even get out a yawn of my mouth" I look out of the window.

„And drank a whole bottle of wine while taking a horrible amount of the sleeping pills my doctor gave me"

„Guys I just need some sleep...I'm okay"
„Yea you need sleep. Tomorrow is your big Solo remember ?" I ignore Jenays sentence. I mean yea. It's a big solo. But I don't feel like doing it anymore. It caused to much stress. I had to loose twenty pounds in like three weeks. I had to grow two inches, with much water and much hair loss. 

„I'm thinking about not doing it" I say still looking out of the window.
„what?" Soph stops the car.
„What do you mean with you thinking about not doing it...? It's tomorrow?" Jenay asks in Shock.

„Plus, it's finally your time to show Zenovia that you are better then Karoline"  soph says before starting the car again.
„I mean, Karoline is better than me. She started at like three. And I started at like five"
Karoline is Zenovia's favorite dancer, it's always Karoline and then me. Jenay and Sophie came a little later that's why they are ranked way lower than me...in Zenovia's eyes.

Her ranking system is literally so toxic, it's not even funny anymore.
We are numbers in her eyes. And I've been dancing for her for like seventeen years.
For her to even call me by my name is someothing that took so long. She's been calling me by my name since two years...

Before that I was „two" because I was ranked as
two, after one.

Karoline #1

I mean, since seventeen years Karo and me are brining her Cold and Silver and never disappoint. But for some reason that gave her the right to become more strict than she is.

„ugh I hate this Karoline girl. She is getting on my nerves" Soph says. And trough her voice we can literally tell the hate she has for her. I mean I would too if you would call me an „Asian Mexican who can't dance because I apparently fell of the bridge while trying to cross it illegally "

Sophia is Filipino...and was born and grew up in Texas, but okay. Racists always be racists, they only care about what they see and not about what the hear...and when they hear, they only want to hear what they want to hear.

In this case...Karoline is just a jealous creature, who's been jealous of Sophia since the day she meet her. Because she knows Sophia can trow her off the chair.