Forgetting the Apocalypse

56. How to Make....

Mara's Pov*

Kailee tended to space out a lot lately. I didn't blame her one bit I just wasn't sure how to reach her. I thought about asking Roone, maybe seeing how he went about with me but then realized it wasn't such a good idea. For one, I'm a terrible patient. Most of the time he skipped the asking nicely part and just went straight to commands. Secondly, is that for all my injuries, it is nothing compared to her loss. It still doesn't seem real to me.

Another thing is that while she and I did get a long surprisingly well, I think the same things that work with me won't be the same things that will work with her. By some miracle, it was just three simple things that Kailee needed.

The first was something that I can very much agree with. Space. She told me that she did her best thinking and processing when she was quiet and alone. The last thing she wanted and needed was those who while having good intentions, hovered over her. I was more than happy to give the space she needed and I was a little confused when she would still come with me but according to her, my demeanor gave her the peace and quietness she was looking for. I'm not gonna lie, that brought a little tear to my eye. Good to know I'm still human.

The second, tasking within reason. Unlike me who cannot hear someone tell me that I couldn't do something otherwise I would get this compulsion to prove them wrong, she can be reasoned with. There are some things that she can't do anymore such as shoot her rifle, she still had many of other things that she can. All it's going to take is relearning how to do them. Some things have taken a little longer but most she could do without assistance.

Finally, the third is complete honesty with no sugar coating and no beating around the bush. Also unlike me who would rather not deal with things that I cannot handle at the moment, she takes the time to sort through everything. Both feelings and thoughts. In the beginning, we all made the mistake of trying not to say her brother's name or mention something that she might have trouble doing due to only having one arm. That royally pissed her off. She went off about us wanting to forget her brother, which is obviously ridiculous.

Easy to say, she's the most mature person I've met. Although the bar is not set that high when I've only known the boys and the dogs. Surely, more mature than me. I would do anything to forget my troubles and pains.

However, knowing the three things she needed and executing them in the right way was elusive to me. I honestly feel like I need to apologize to Roone because every little thing that she's trying to in order to relearn her habits has me biting my nails. I'm doing every thing possible to avoid hovering and constantly checking if she needs any help but the only thing I came up with was watching her out of the corner of my eye like some creep.

I didn't want to be a dick and give really simple tasks either, making her feel like a child or an invalid but it's not like looking for stones is such a difficult task. Plus she won't be alone, Riva is going along with her. Meanwhile, Roone and I are in charge of finding sugar, honey baking sheets and small plastic containers. Here was another miracle. We only needed one stop for everything and found them all. I know that Roone had a point that we really wouldn't have a problem in finding such supplies because they weren't something that were necessary to survive. Well the plastic containers were something that we could really use as we've almost run out of ziploc bags but I didn't think we'd find them here.

I slung my pack over my shoulder after putting the last Tupperware I had found in it. Being done in our shopping, I was able to look out and take in the scene before me. We were on a path that was eerily nicknamed the Dead Horse Trail. It's real name was called White Pass but according to the boys, it was called dead horse trail because of all the dead horses that had fallen during the gold rush here. So many that were starving only had their dead meat to eat in order to survive here.