to capture a heart

a dark past.

Lorenzo Russo

Flashback

"Mr river what will we be doing for my 14th birthday? I was thinking we could go to the zoo" I smiled at him innocently whilst he looked at me with an upset face "Enzo your father wants you home for your 14th birthday he told me he has something special planned for you"

I stared at him blankly. I don't want to go back to that monster.
"b-but he hurts me mr river" Mr river cupped my face "Call me Dad Enzo I've told you multiple times, and I promise if he lays a finger on you tomorrow I'll take him out of this world." I started sniffling fearing my life for tomorrow.

"Hey little guy, happy birthday" máma (Mrs. River) woke me up with a massive smile drawn across her face and some cake and balloons. "Thank you máma" I got up and put my favourite clothes on. My favourite colour was blue so I put all my blue clothes on and ran down to see everyone singing me happy birthday and handing me gifts.

I got cars from Chris and Adri and clothes and money from máma and Dad. I thanked everyone as Dad took me to my father's house. We pulled up and Dad walked me in, before father took me in Dad pulled him aside and all I heard was,

"Touch him or hurt him I'll fucking kill you and your bloodline understand Cagna?" my father evilly snickered as Dad left us alone.

Father immediately took me to an area. It had green neon LED lights outside and the sign said "desires" I gulped instantly knowing here I could die if my father wanted. My father didn't speak to me once until we pulled up. "Now you're 14 you need to act as a man" I shot him a confused face as he roared with laughter and escorted me inside. I was hit in the face with a sickening stench. My father spoke to the man in the office who stared at me for a while giving me a sympathetic smile.

We walked through a couple of doors until Father told me to go inside a room and told me to become a man. Being the innocent child I was I strolled in to see 2 women. stripped from their clothes. The realisation hit me on what my father wanted me to do. Tears filled my eyes as fear filled me. I didn't want this they're too old. I banged on the door for my father. "Father I think you took me to the wrong door, you would never want me to do this, I know I'm a horrible son but please forgive me I'll come back to you, you can abuse me all you want I just don't want to do this."

I continuously carried this on until I realised it was hopeless until I completed my act of being a 'man'. So I did it. I forced myself through the entire process, the women led helped me throughout it to make themselves feel good.

Though it felt good I felt repulsed the entire time. I knew how to do everything and I used both of them back of forth, i kept waiting for the door to click so I could be finished but it felt like an eternity waiting. It probably had been 2 hours and I was exhausted. When I was done the door finally unlocked and I saw my dad come out of another room. He smirked at me "Happy birthday son".

I scratched the back of my head implying that was the end of my 14th birthday. Vivian's eyes were filled with tears "Oh my God he's horrible Enzo, I'm so sorry you had to go through any of that." I shook my head "It's fine it's over with now" she sniffled "What did dad do?"

I came back home and ran to Dad. "How was it son?" I shook my head not wanting to answer as my bottom lip quivered, attempting to not burst into tears I opened my mouth telling him all about my day. His jaw tensed with anger. his fists were in a ball as he called máma to comfort me and he ran out of the house with a couple of men.

All I know is my father was dead. Dad told me when I got older that he decapitated my father and sent his head to my mother. Then he burnt the "desires". My mother blamed me. She didn't invite me to his funeral and wanted nothing to do with me. She hated me.

The woman who gave birth to me hated me. The man who helped me come to this world forced me to have sex. I thought your dad and mum were the only humans in this world to love you. Why didn't mine love me? Was I that disgusting of a human that my parents hated me? Was I unlovable?

a couple of days later I got the news that I was the mafia king for the Vipers. Knowing I couldn't show anyone my tears or fear I shut them off. I stopped showing my emotions. The only people in this world who have seen me cry were máma and dad. I became ruthless I stopped caring about anyone. I brought myself a reputation which everyone feared.

I made myself the Viper mafia king. Someone who nobody could ever mess with. Soon after my rein, my mother died from suicide. She was depressed after my father's death and killed herself. I blamed myself for both of their deaths. I was unlovable because I killed my parents. Their blood was on my hands. Even though they barely fed me and abused me. They used to get glass and cut my hands if I refused something. They would endlessly beat me when they got drunk and use me as their punching bag.

Even though they told me I was worthless and deserved to die at the age of 8 I still killed them. It was all my fault. I started to conceal all my feelings. I started to call strippers in to have sex instead of waiting for a woman to love me. Love was fucking bullshit. It was a fairytale from a bunch of people who had nothing to do with their lives. Lorenzo Russo doesn't love or date he is a ruthless murderer. a monster. Because who would love a boy who killed his parents right?

"Yeah that's all, to be honest, I have some family around but yeah" Vivian was crying at this point and hugged me. she hugged me. My whole body tensed. I froze. I couldn't handle that. so I pushed her off me and got off the bed. She looked at me confused with tears filling her eyes "I'm sorry Vi I just can't handle this. I can't handle your touch on me" I walked off leaving her broken. unlovable Lorenzo. worthless. fucking shit.

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um sorry for the sad chapter..!