Satan's Sinner's #3: Becca and Bullet

Chapter 9

Becca POV

It's been a month since Grey's first birthday. We're only five days away from Christmas, and thankfully, the club's Christmas party is tonight. We invited Brynn, Ryan, and Quinn tonight as Ryan had been talking to Leif about possibly prospecting. I don't think Leif was actually going to go for it, considering what he was doing to Brynn, but I do think it was a way to keep him close. Tonight was important, because Brynn had been at the hospital for two weeks, working in the ED as reception. I wanted to check in with her, see how things were going at home.

We became fast friends. Bullet did say that they had to do some fibbing to Ryan to get him to open up more, including saying he has me 'under his thumb' and stuff like that. I told him whatever needed to be done to build a good case against him if we needed to use it against him. I told him I didn't want to know what was happening on the Ryan side of things. I just wanted to focus on my friendships and Grey. He looked a little hurt when I said that, but I hope he knows that's all I can offer him. I'm no where close to being able to give him more than that. Am I still attracted to him sexually? Fuck yes. Does that mean I'm willing or ready to act on it? Not even close.

I'm wearing my red, short-sleeved, tea-length dress. It looked like a 1950s-style party dress. My green velvet, peep-toe, t-strap heels were low, so I wouldn't fall on my ass. Walking into the party, I instantly see Parker and Kai. Both are dressed impeccably in Christmas suits. They were wearing red and white, looking fabulous. Michael Bublé was playing on the speakers. Willow and the rest of us ladies had decorated a ton of trees, turning the clubhouse into a beautiful winter wonderland. I see Brynn in a long sleeved, floor-length green dress, Quinn in a white button-down shirt, and khakis. He looked so handsome.

"You guys look fantastic. Is Ryan here with you guys?" I looked around, not seeing him, but also knowing he wouldn't leave them in a room with this many other men without being close.

"He, um," she looked around, seeing if Quinn was paying attention. She whispered, "He found another source of entertainment. Thank fuck." We moved a little bit away from everyone, but where we could still see Quinn. "They left about ten minutes ago. This girl seems to think they're going to be gone a while. She told me not to wait up for him." My eyes widened. The boldness of some of these women.

"I guess the good news is, we have to talk about the plan more. How's it going? Have you gotten the storage locker? What about the savings account?" I asked lowly, just in case. Some walls have ears. She nodded. Looking around, I saw Ryan coming back into the main room, disheveled clothing and all, followed closely by...no. way.

No fucking way!

Is that JoEllen?! What the fuck is she doing here?! Where is Bullet? I pull out my phone, thinking, 'Thank God River has Grey tonight. Thank God!' I pulled up my text thread to see no new messages. I pulled up the call log and pressed his name.

Ring. Ring. Ri—

"Hey! Sorry, I just walked into the clubhouse. Where are you?"

"Near the bar, but towards the back." I saw him. He looks amazing. He's wearing a navy suit with a white button down and tweed vest, with brown dress shoes. He looked so fucking sexy. His head was freshly shaved, his beard trimmed to perfection. I could see the slight smile peeking out from the beard and mustache.

"I see you. That dress looks amazing on you." He tucked his phone in his pocket, "And those shoes tie the whole outfit together." He had me spin around to give him the full view. "Spectacular. Stunning. Christmas is my new favorite holiday." I chuckled as Nat King Cole came on the speakers, and he held my hand, asking for a dance. I smiled at him, walking out to the dance floor. His arms wrapped around me, holding me gently, yet firmly against him. As we swayed, I filled him in on seeing my sister and Ryan coming back into the room together. Sex-hair and clothing readjustment and all.

"He's a piece of work. He may not know what he's throwing away, but it seems someone has taken notice," he tilted his head to where Doc was talking to Brynn, simply about work and how she was settling in at the hospital, but we knew it was more than that. Doc didn't talk to anyone unless he had to. He'd rather be in his bubble of medical mysteries.

"Do you think?" I asked, and he nodded.

"That's the look that I had when I first saw you. That's the moment I knew. The difference is, Doc won't fuck up like I did. He'll be good to her and Quinn. I think they'll be excellent together. Just an easy love, ya know?"

"No. I thought we had that," I said quietly as he pulled me impossible close.

"Look at me." I stared at his chest, fighting tears. Why does this happen every time?! Is it because it feels so right in his arms, but I know in my mind I can't? Because I know how badly he hurt me? How badly could he hurt me again? A strangled sound came out of him, "please."

I looked at him. He looked like he wanted to cry too. But he's a badass biker. He could never and would never. "We do have that. I got lost. I got lost for a little bit, but you are the only path I see in my life. Even if you don't want me or can't forgive me. You are it for me. I love you so incredibly much. I will continue to work to prove myself to you. Please don't give up on me. Don't give up on us." The first tear fell down his cheek. This man was crying in front of others. "I need you in my life. Without you...even with Grey. She'd be the only light I have for brief moments. Nothing like the warmth and sunshine that you brought to my life all the time. Day or night."

He was completely opening up to me. I froze. I pulled him back off to the side, away from others ears. "Cameron, I don't know if I can do this. It's a huge ask...to trust you again."

"I know. But, Becca...I love you. I won't stop proving myself to you each and every day for the rest of my life if you'd let me one day. I just want you to be open to giving me a chance. Please." He looked at me so earnestly, so hopeful.

"I'll think about it. I want reassurances that you won't slip back into whatever it was before. And not just in pretty words. I want actions." I looked him in the eye, making sure he understood I needed this. He needs to hear me.

He nods, "Want me to take you home?" Now it's my turn to nod. I throw a smile in for good measure. We head to grab my coat from the table where he conveniently left his. He's being flirty, gentlemanly, respectful...he's been reading or doing classes or something. He's so different.

He helps me with my coat, we say our goodbyes to those who were left, and he walks me around the clubhouse and around the compound until we reach the house I live in with Kai and Parker. All the lights are off, but who knows what I'll be walking in on. Those two can get a little too carried away sometimes.

"Thank you for walking me home." I said, looking up at him. He was looking at me. The wind kicked up and I shivered. Not from the cold, from the way he was eyeing me. He kept his eyes laser focused on me.

"It's cold. Head inside. I'll stay here til I hear it lock." He smiled a small smile at me. I nodded, and hurried inside. Closing the door, I engaged the lock and headed up to my room, keeping my hands around my eyes like I was wearing blinders.

"I haven't seen anything. I'll be upstairs in a minute. Have at it after I close the door. I love you both" I said as I walked up the stairs, shutting my door behind me as I heard chuckling and giggles. Those two. You can NEVER be too careful in this house!