CHAPTER 5

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Jisoo softly kissed Chaeyoung's chest, her arms draped carelessly around her, One hand constantly rubbing up and down her back

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Jisoo softly kissed Chaeyoung's chest, her arms draped carelessly around her, One hand constantly rubbing up and down her back.




They'd been like this for a very long period of time, lying on her bed, close together. Chaeyoung  would occasionally take the time to feast on her neck, kissing and lightly sucking it, while continuing her hand's everlasting motion on her back. Jisoo would take turns with her, kissing her chest like she was at the moment, when she wasn't enjoying her neck.




They were both in clothes, the top half of Chaeyoung's flannel unbuttoned. They weren't anywhere near sex right now, they were just cuddling.




And it was nice. Jisoo couldn't think of any better feeling in the world than the one that overcame her when Chaeyoung  held her. Sex was amazing, probably the next best feeling on her list. But when Chaeyoung  held her she felt love and comfort and irrational happiness, and it was wonderful.




"This is nice." Chaeyoung murmured, very quietly, staring at the wall, as she enjoyed the feeling of Jisoo's body next to hers.




"I'm glad I stayed here instead of going to some stupid party. I like to listen to you breathing."




Jisoo smiled, and ran her nails up and down Chaeyoung's stomach, gently scratching it.




"I wish we could always be like this Chaeyoung." she said quietly and softly.




"Sometimes I do too." Chaeyoung replied. She kissed the top of her head.




"Sometimes I think that being with you is the only thing that will make me happy, but other times.." She trailed off, not intending to finish her sentence.



Jisoo finished it for her, "You think Suzy's the one who makes you happy?" she asked.




"I don't know Soo." Chaeyoung sighed.




"When I'm around you, I feel so at peace and part of a whole, like I'm incomplete or something when I'm not with you. But I wonder if that's just because I'm cheating on my girlfriend and feel guilty about it, and being with you makes me feel less alone, because we commit these acts together."





Jisoo could't believe how openly Chaeyoung  was discussing this with her. Her words stung, though she hadn't intended at all for them to. Chaeyoung wasn't saying what Jisoo wanted to hear, she wasn't admitting any true love towards her, despite the passion she saw in her eyes when she looked at her and felt in her body when they made love.





Her words remained hollow, free of attachment to her or Suzy. It was her custom to speak this way, completely honest and out in the open, her words unclouded with biased emotions. Jisoo imagined in her mind herself looking up at Chaeyoung  at that moment and saying, " love you," the way she had longed to so many times before.





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