Dead Ends // Hugh Jackman

Chapter 9

Throughout the whole show, I keep telling myself that Hugh isn't the only man on earth to have a trench coat. Him and the creep could be two different people, but it would explain why he's not here with me right now. It's because he's the fucking star of the show!

Maybe it's just a coincidence. Maybe the boss the security guard refers to is working on different business. But I have the feeling tingling in the pit of my stomach that feels partial to that thought.

It came in threes. Different hints that the universe threw right in my face to subtly fill me in on that Hugh has been the person I've been looking for this entire time, and I was kind of warned that it would be him.

The first one was in the dean's office when I saw that flyer. The second when I found out Carlos and him were close friends and that he would get tickets to Magic Man just because of it. The third was more out there. I mean Milo basically manifested it. That the creep was a celebrity and that it could be Hugh Jackman. Jokes or not, this is some next level voodoo shit.

My anxiety is telling me to hightail it out of here when the intermission starts. I glance at the security guard and wonder what lengths he'll go through to force me to stay, but then I realize that's not his job. He's here to protect, not to keep me here against my will.

I think he can feel my gaze on him because he turns his head to look down at me in my seat. My eyes widen, and I quickly twist forward, facing the stage once more. There's about 5 more minutes left until the show resumes when I check my phone. That's how much time I have left to escape.

I'm having this internal battle. On whether I should risk finding out who really has my book just so I can get it back, or go home and forget that all of this even happened. I mean, if it is Hugh, I wouldn't mind him keeping it. Hell, he can slap his name on it and say it's his. He would get no arguments from me. In the back of my head though, I can hear Milo. If I leave now, he'll tell me that this could've been an amazing opportunity. I don't see how it could be one, but he always did have a knack for seeing things I never could.

Inhaling deeply, I decide to stay.

Watching the second half of the show eases my nerves. The music and magic in the dancing unfolds a beautiful story.

Hugh's character, Harold, is changing, becoming a better man as he falls in love with Marian. What had started out as him trying to con her brother turns into a journey of self-improvement and growth.

I forgot how much I enjoyed musicals and the theatre arts.

I used to dance a lot as a kid, but dreams change as you get older. And the realities of the world tend to put it all on hold when you have to worry about providing and taking care of yourself.

Not everyone can make a living off of singing and dancing. Or, in my case, publishing a book. Odds are I won't make a dime, but dreams aren't meant to be jobs. They're not supposed to feel like they take away from your life. They add purpose and happiness. If the world didn't revolve around money, I'd have chased my dreams without a care in the world.

I have all this anxiety of not being enough or doing what's expected of me. I'm such a people pleaser that I tend to forget about myself in the process. I guess I always thought that someone would do the same for me. That someone would go out of their way just to see me smile.

Milo has done a lot for me. I feel like such a burden a lot of the time. Living with him and stacking onto his bills. I know it's not easy. I've made his life so much more stressful. It becomes a vicious cycle. Because even if he doesn't say it, I know he would like to live entirely on his own. It kind of feels like he's babysitting me. To be an adult and somehow still feel like a kid.