It's hard knowing that it's only the second day of classes and I already want to quit. I can't believe I have to go through 14 more weeks of this. It's agony. I know I'm extremely privileged to be able to say that. Believe me, it's not lost on me. I was laying in my bed, in the total darkness just staring at my ceiling. I can't believe I feel like this again. I wish I didn't. I wish I could be normal. I wish I could just do it and not bitch like a pussy about it the whole time. I'm so lucky to be able to do this, and I should appreciate it more. That being said, I can't wait until it's over.
Willow said something that was oddly hard hitting to me today. She said "I think true love is being able to argue with someone and be confident they won't leave" I didn't really know what to make of that, but I knew it was something I wanted to tell you.
Yeah, they're fighting again. What can you do?
I'm tired of being lonely. I refuse to let myself succumb to it. I will find my way out. Damn it. How will I ever get out of this labyrinth?
I have been thinking a lot about visiting you. Almost an embarrassing amount. A summer 2020 amount. Imagine telling us of summer 2020 that wed be planning a trip for me to see you. I'm so excited. I keep playing out these scenarios of what I imagine it'll be like. That's really embarrassing. I love telling you embarrassing things. You pull embarrassing things out of me with ease. I wish I could figure out why.
I've been obsessed with Maps by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs. It's the only song I've been listening to.
I can't wait to talk to you again.
Made off
Don't stray
Well, my kind's your kind
I'll stay the same
Pack up
Don't stray
