Judas Romanovski, the man people warned me about, the man people feared, the man who destroyed the only thing I thought I had control of- my morals, my patience, my heart. I was deceived first, and then entangled in lies he weaved with his sinful fi...
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******* "Where have you been?" Her voice was calm yet pierced through me as I avoided eye contact with her. The kind that made my heart twist painfully.
"I was..." The words died in my throat.
"You always disappear without a word." She took a step closer, her frustration simmering just beneath the surface. "I looked for you everywhere. I was fucking worried, and you didn't even see it necessary to text me?"
"Alina—"
"Is someone bothering you?" Her tone softened and her eyes searched mine as I swallowed hard. "Are you in some kind of danger?"
My breath hitched. Why did she think that? A chill ran down my spine as I avoided her gaze, staring instead at the floor.
"Why... why do you think so?"
"Because I know you spend most of your day out, barely in the hostel." Her voice wavered slightly. "I know you go somewhere and come back looking like..." She gestured at my clothes, the ill-fitting ones I hadn't even noticed were wrong. "This." A sigh escaped her lips. "Damn, these aren't even yours. And you look like a damsel."
A damsel.
She was worried. Too worried. And I didn't know how to make it better. How to make the guilt go away. Should I tell her? About Judas? The thought alone sent a shiver through me, igniting a firestorm of memories I wished I could forget. But if I told her, she'd want to know everything. And once I started, I wasn't sure I could stop.
I couldn't let her become a liability, and knowing Judas, he'd use her against me. She was the closest best friend I had in this country, and I couldn't bear the thought of dragging her into my darkness.
And there was nothing she could do either. Not her, not even Ivan no matter what he claimed.
My throat tightened and I could feel her eyes on me.
"You can talk to me; you know?" Her voice was softer now.
What if she couldn't handle it? What if she looked at me differently? But wasn't she already seeing the cracks? The way I came back to her like a ghost, wearing clothes that didn't belong to me, with a heart that wasn't whole anymore.
I swallowed hard, trying to push down the fear. I owed her this much. But did I owe her the dangers that came with it?
"No." My sharp voice was unrecognisable to my own ears. My heart burned and so did my eyes as I turned away from her. "You don't have to act like my Mom, Alina. I know what's best for me."
Her breath hitched, I could feel her flinch, but I couldn't look at her, not now. The silence stretched and my chest heaved realising what I was saying.
