Hold On I Still Need You

-A Moment of Clarity-

A/N: Song: "Clarity" Zedd. FEAT: Foxes

Sophie's POV:

The room was filled with the soft beeping of machines and the steady hum of the sterile environment, breaking the silence. I lay still in my hospital bed, late into the night, past the usual bustle of nurses and visitors. The once chaotic atmosphere of the hospital had now slowed to a quiet lull. The faint glow of the moon filtered through the window, casting a cool light across my room.

Keefe sat beside her, chatting lightly about trivial matters—his recent escapades, summer plans, and amusing stories that brought a smile to my face. However, my thoughts were elsewhere. Despite my body slowly recovering, I still felt fragile, weighed down by the challenges I had endured and the uncertainties that loomed ahead. My illness had pushed me to the brink, forcing me to confront the fleeting nature of life. While Keefe's words were meant to reassure me, they also stirred a deeper unease within me, prompting questions about what lay ahead, my future, and the fragile connection between us.

I reached out and touched his arm, breaking the silence between us. "Hey, what's on your mind?" I asked softly. Keefe looked up, his expression a mix of sadness and frustration. "I don't know," he replied, his voice barely above a whisper. "I just feel...lost." I nodded, understanding. Sometimes, we all feel that way. I squeezed his hand, offering silent support. We sat there in companionable silence, the weight of his emotions hanging heavy in the air. But I knew that together, we would find our way through this.

His gaze met mine, and for the first time in a long while, there was no joke, no playful glint in his eyes. Just rawness.

"I don't know, Sophie," he said, his voice quieter than usual, almost like he was unsure about saying it out loud. "I've been thinking a lot lately. About everything that's happened. About why I always try to make people laugh."

I blinked, unsure of what to say. Keefe, the king of jokes, the one who always knew how to lift the mood, was serious? That was new. "I've spent most of my life making light of everything," he continued, running a hand through his hair. "Like, if I could make people laugh, they wouldn't see the parts of me that are... scared. Or vulnerable."

I looked at him, trying to understand what he was saying. "You're afraid?" I asked, surprised. It seemed unlike the confident Keefe I knew.

He nodded, his smile not reaching his eyes. "Yes. I'm scared of losing people. Losing... you." His voice trailed off, and the gravity of his words hit me.

"You're afraid of losing me?" I whispered, the thought making my chest tighten.

He looked into my eyes, his expression softening as if he was finally opening up. "I know it may sound silly, but I'm scared. Scared that one day, you won't need me anymore. Or that... I won't be there when you need me." His voice trembled slightly, revealing a vulnerability I hadn't seen before.

I was momentarily speechless, weighed down by the gravity of his confession. It dawned on me that Keefe's humor and pranks were not just for laughs; they were a defense mechanism, a way to shield himself from his fear of loss.

My heart softened as I spoke softly, "Keefe, I... I need you. You've always been there for me, even when I didn't deserve it. I think we both share that fear of losing people."

He let out a slow breath, seeming relieved. "I guess we do, huh?" A genuine smile graced his face. "I'm glad you understand. I just... I don't want to hold you back, you know?"

"You're not holding me back," I said firmly, my voice steady despite the rush of emotions swirling inside me. "You're the one who's helped me keep going. You've always been there."