﹒ ◠ 𝓓𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝓓𝐢𝐚𝐫𝐲 ⊹ ﹒
Like any other drastic changing teenage life which involves of course an older guy with a large age gap.
˖🫐⋆࿐໋. "i came across those autumn eyes in a dream." ──★ ˙ ̟👼🏻!!
It's been a couple weeks since Tom saw my scars, i'm at home right now playing Simba, his black feisty tail playfully hitting my mattress. I haven't been to school in a few days my phones been on silent, all i've been doing these past days is stay in my bedroom and light cigarettes while watching the greenery of my garden, then i'd spray my perfume to cover up the blissful smell of tobacco.
๑‧˚꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦˚‧๑˖🧃˖๑‧˚꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦˚๑˖
My phone spammed with messages from Tom, my Nana and my mother. My mother was staying back at her friends again, my father. Well i have no idea, i don't really care. And as for Tom i have no clue too, probably pacing around his house trying to get anything even a simple word to see if i was ok. meanwhile i felt fine, great. Joyful which was peculiar, my mind was empty apart from tracing back to Lana del rey songs and organising a second life. Wondering how i'd live in someone else's body, mind and state.
๑‧˚꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦˚‧๑˖🧃˖๑‧˚꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦˚๑˖
I lit another cigarette, when i was staying over Toms just as he was about to drop me back off home i stole a packet. The lighter i found in my self harm box painted in a pale pink. Pink was such a depressing, sinful yet blissful colour. But so could any colour, i guess pink stuck to me because it reminds me of my childhood when Nana used to plait my hair in the garden then take me to school.
๑‧˚꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦˚‧๑˖🧃˖๑‧˚꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦︶︶₊꒷꒦˚๑˖
I exhaled deeply, letting my inner core get a subtle chance to settle down. Bringing everything out of me, all the toxins and mental chemicals out of my system. I threw my cigarette out the window, taking my shirt and skirt off. It's fun to dance around in your lingerie, in a warm environment with a vividly colourful atmosphere just outside your window, the rain spitting with sparks of relief feeding the flowers and plants that soon yet to be blossomed. Life was gratification at some points, just not as regular as the thunder storms you'd receive in your system and vacuous cherry bleeding heart.
