Bound by Fate - SaneGiyuu

Seventeen - The Kiss

Giyuu sat at the edge of his bed, staring blankly out of the window. The night was quiet, save for the occasional rustle of leaves outside, but the silence did little to ease his mind. His thoughts were a chaotic storm of uncertainty, fear, and confusion—emotions he'd been trying to keep buried for the past few weeks. But lately, they'd been creeping in more frequently, no matter how much he tried to push them aside.

His mission with Shinobu weighed heavily on him. They had been sent to this world for a reason, tasked with preventing a disaster that neither of them fully understood. And yet, they were no closer to figuring out what they were supposed to do. The only thing Giyuu knew for certain was that Sanemi was at the center of it all. But how? And why?

He leaned back against the wall, rubbing his hands over his face as memories of his past missions flooded his mind. The master had told him, not too long ago, about his special ability—the ability to choose whether someone lived or died in a crucial moment. It explained so much, so many things that had confused him in the past.

He recalled the visits to elderly people or sick children, moments when he had felt a deep sadness for them, wishing they had more time to enjoy life. And then, miraculously, they did. People who should have passed away suddenly made full recoveries, living weeks, months, sometimes even years longer than expected.

At the time, he hadn't questioned it. He had thought it was luck, coincidence, or divine intervention. But now, he understood it was his doing. His power.

And it wasn't just the people who lived. He thought of the criminals, the murderers, the despicable individuals he and Shinobu had encountered in their travels. There had been moments when Giyuu had felt nothing but disgust toward them. Moments when, deep down, he wished they wouldn't survive their fate. And they hadn't. They had died—some in tragic accidents, others in ways that couldn't be explained.

It was all him. His thoughts, his judgments, had directly influenced whether people lived or died. He hadn't realized it before, but now that he knew, it left him feeling... powerless, despite the nature of his gift.

Giyuu clenched his fists, frustration simmering in his chest. How was he supposed to use this power? Was he even using it correctly? He didn't know when to intervene or how to determine who was deserving of life and who wasn't. It felt like an impossible responsibility, and the weight of it was suffocating.

To make matters worse, he had kept this revelation from Shinobu and Kyojuro. It wasn't that he didn't trust them—he did. But they were already stressing about their mission, struggling to figure out how to move forward. Adding this to their burdens wouldn't help. So, he carried it alone, even though it was tearing him apart.

And then there was Sanemi.

Giyuu's heart tightened in his chest at the thought of him. Things had been different between them lately—at least on Giyuu's end. He couldn't deny that he had developed feelings for Sanemi, feelings that made everything more complicated. Back when he had thought of Sanemi as just an objective, it had been easy to spend time with him. It had been easy to engage in conversation, to laugh at Sanemi's jokes, and to let himself enjoy their moments together.

But now that Giyuu's feelings had grown deeper, everything had changed. Being around Sanemi was becoming harder with each passing day. Giyuu found himself shrinking into himself whenever Sanemi was near. He avoided eye contact, kept his responses short, and if Sanemi asked to hang out, Giyuu would come up with excuses—"I'm busy," or "I have plans," or "Maybe another time."

It hurt to distance himself, but Giyuu didn't know how to handle the overwhelming guilt he felt. He was deceiving Sanemi, hiding the truth from him, and it made him feel like a terrible person. How could he keep pretending that everything was normal when it was far from it?