From Reluctance to Desire: A Mafia Story [JJK]

✨STEPS TOWARD US✨

I replayed the events of the evening in my head—Jungkook teasing me, the way his eyes had sparkled with a mischievous glint, the genuine warmth in his laughter. It was such a stark contrast to the image I had of him when we first got married. Back then, he had been like a shadow—always present, always watching, but distant and unreachable. The transformation, even if temporary, was almost unbelievable.

But what did it mean? Why was he starting to let his guard down around me? And why did it make my heart flutter in a way that left me feeling unsteady?

As I strolled through the moonlit paths, my mind wandered back to the dance at the party. The memory of Jungkook's touch sent an involuntary shiver down my spine. The way he had looked at me this evening, teasing yet tinged with something deeper, left me wondering. Was he feeling the same confusing pull between us, or was I simply reading too much into every glance and word?

Lost in my thoughts, I nearly jumped at approaching footsteps. Turning around, I saw Jungkook standing a few feet away. His face was partially shadowed in the dim light, making his expression unreadable. I hadn't expected him to return so soon.

"Couldn't sleep?" he asked, his voice low and almost soothing against the quiet of the night.

I shrugged, attempting to mask my nervousness. "Just needed some fresh air," I replied, hoping he wouldn't catch the slight tremor in my voice.

He nodded, taking a step closer, his gaze never leaving mine. "Julia told you something, didn't she?"

I hesitated, unsure how much to reveal. It felt like admitting that Julia had seen something in him that I hadn't, or perhaps didn't want to acknowledge. Finally, I took a breath and spoke. "She just mentioned that she hadn't seen you laugh in a long time."

His face darkened for a moment, a flash of something—regret, maybe?—crossing his eyes before he quickly masked it. He looked away, his jaw tightening slightly. "I guess I've been that way for a reason," he murmured, almost as if he were speaking to himself.

The silence that followed was thick with unspoken words. I wanted to reach out, to ask him why he had built these walls around himself, but I was terrified of overstepping. Yet, some unseen force within me pushed the question out.

"Why?" I asked, my voice barely more than a whisper. "Why did you become... like this?"

His eyes snapped back to mine, dark and guarded. "Life changes you," he said, his tone flat and devoid of emotion. "You either become hard or you break."

His words carried the weight of so much unspoken pain and experience. They hinted at a past filled with events that had molded him into the man standing before me. I wanted to pry further, to understand what had scarred him so deeply, but the look in his eyes told me he wasn't ready to share that part of himself yet.

"I don't think you're as hard as you want people to believe," I said softly, almost challenging his resolve.

A bitter smile twisted his lips. "You don't know me, Y/N."

"Maybe not," I admitted, refusing to break eye contact. "But I think I'm starting to."

He opened his mouth to respond, but then closed it again, his expression a mix of vulnerability and defiance. It was a side of him I hadn't seen before, and it tugged at something deep within me.

He sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I don't know what you want from me," he finally said, his voice low and strained.