Love Procedure: SOOBIN & SOHEE

16: nights

San's POV:

How long do I have to see Sohee suffer? My hands clawed away at the locked door. When did I feel this way for her? It's been a while. I saw Sohee has a woman ever since she developed feelings for Yeonjun. That bastard never deserved to be loved by her, but I had to choose him over her in the end.

Sohee's a tough strong leader, but how long have you endured alone when we were gone? I wanted to be a strong oppa you could lean on, but I was weak. A follower in the end. I never forgave myself.

Working out was a solution. It helped me ease my mind, but the more stronger I got the more colder she was. It made me happy that she was happy with another man, Soobin.

It hurt. I admit I love you. But I know you're meant for someone better, I'm not the one for you. I wished on every star I was the one for you. But I'm unfitting.

How do you think my heart felt when we started getting sexual? It didn't feel right, I loved every moment but I was playing the role that wasn't me.

I pity you Sohee.
You have no idea what love is.
I wish you loved me before those two idiots, I wish I embraced you before Soobin did, I wanted to see the vulnerable side that I only caught glimpses of first.

When you scream Soobin's name out when I make love to you, I wish you'd call on 'San' just once, call out my name. San-oppa.

I gave up on you a long time ago, but I still have the chance to be with you now. I'm not a selfish person Sohee. Don't make me chase after you. You make it hard.

I remember a year ago, when you first found out Soobin actually left. You fell to your knees in your office devastated, you couldn't even reach contact with him. All I could do was console you with a meaningless hug. You fell depressed for only a day, you snapped back out of it.

You always had ambition, but it was always that one boy to light up your eyes. It was Yeojun then, now I can clearly see it's Soobin. The story repeats itself.

"San... you said you'd be here for me right?"
She looks at me with those lifeless eyes as she slowly lets go of the hug, we're both on the ground.

Don't look at me that. You're too pretty. Your eyes shine but they look so dull, please bring back the spark I remembered. I can notice every small thing about you Sohee, can Yeonjun do the same?

"Yes..."
I say with a comforting smile, I want her to know I'm there for her.

She wraps her arms around my neck, I suddenly get tense and feel my cheeks a burning red. I'm blushing, I feel like I'm going to burn up. This was way different than a mutual hug, I can feel her breasts and her warm breath hovering against my neck as she comes closer.

I whimper a bit as she nibbles my earlobe,
"Then take it off."

"W-what??"
My face red and my body is about to explode.

"Your clothes."
Her voice tickled against my neck, my body couldn't loosen up now.

I've gotten myself mixed into trouble, oh Sohee you vixen.

. . .
We made passionate love, it felt so good doing it with Sohee. But it seemed like she didn't pay attention to me at all. Doing it on the couch was quite a special experience, it was my first time and I don't think I wasted it at all. I caress her tired face as she lay spent on the couch, dozing off.

Where did this fiery part of you come from? Is it hidden behind those fiery eyes?

After that night, it became a more of a daily thing. Everyday after work and date nights promoting her relationship with Yeonjun.

I could get used to it, but I wish she looked at me with love. It had gotten worse after she screamed... his name. Soobin. When she screams it with passion every night how could I not forget that name? Who are you?

Who are you to set her to ablaze like this? Can you possibly surpass Yeonjun?

As we fucked this night, she felt more sadder than usual. But I went with it.
"I wish I could've said I love you sooner."
She moaned in my ear softly.

My heart pounded out my chest, my ear turned bright red. If only she said that to me.
She's not talking to me right now, she's pretending I'm someone else.

Some days she'd fuck me with different emotions, it'd be scary when she was mad. Sometimes she'd curse me, but not me, Soobin. The image she created of me. She'd take however she felt out on the idol she created of me.

You're crazy you know that right? Having a husband, thinking of another man, then fucking a different man? It doesn't matter, because I love you. I will go at different lengths for you. You don't have to say you love me back, I kiss her hand as a thrust inside her gently while she cursed at me relentlessly.

No matter what stones she threw at me, she had no one left but me. I'll always crawl back to you when I can.

Unfortunately I'm no different from Soobin. We're just dogs, my status sits low. How can I compete?

All my innocence is gone. When I wake up I feel like shit because she's never by my side. It's only one night.

How can I get closer to you?

I waited an hour like a dog by the door, you finally come out. Your lipsticks smudged. It's just you leaving, Yeonjun had something's to finish up.

I have my arms spread open so she can lean on me, I have broad shoulders and a big chest. I can give you all the hugs you need.

She leans on me tired,
"I feel disgusted San. We might have to do it again today."

You already know what she means when she says 'do it.'

I think I'm sick of it. Not her, I just want to be loved by her. I know that's too much to ask, but it short form I want her to be happy. If it's not me then so be it, but I really wish it were...

"San?"
She looks up at me waving her hand around, earth-to-san.

"Ahem! Why don't we try somewhere else? We always do it in your office... why not a hotel..?"
I shyly offer.

"Hm.. sure, why not."
She giggles, dragging me by my tie to the car.